English weather and bad crew!

Sailorsam101

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I didn't want to go as the forecast was bad for at least a week but she wanted to so i did! First mistake!

So on my little Targa 33 we set off to Weymouth from yarmouth into a foretasted F2 with no rain. Obviously this turned into a F5 with heavy showers on the nose all the way there! SWMBO was throwing up but wanted to carry on at 10 kts! We arrived just as it was getting dark and found a nice quiet spot near the HM office..all good so far after a hot shower.

Next morning wok to heavy rain and F6 all day..a lost day!

The next day woke to sunshine and a foretasted F2 from the SW...right i thought lets get round Bill and off to Dartmouth. Got in shore past the bill and a F5 on the nose appeared again...SWMBO was scared so we turned around and headed for Swanage. had the best drive ever on the water...24kts sufing along with a 5 gusting 7..wonderful stuff.

Mooring buoy in Swanage and lunch on the beech...all good so far.

Lets go have a night in Poole i say..OK she says..off we go. get to within 200 meters of Poole marina..."I don't like it here...I don't want to stay here" she says forcefully...OK so another u turn and off we go.

"lets pick up an empty mooring buoy for lunch" i say.."OK" she says. Motor into the harbour and find a buoy..."do you remember how to do this" i say..."yes of course i do..do you think i'm stupid" she says!!!!

"You will need the boat hook" i say...."Whats a boat hook"..."the big long grey thing over there"..."thats not a boat hook...that's the grappling hook" she says..she was serious!

"OK whatever...go forward and pick up the rope UNDER the small buoy" i say "YES I KNOW WHAT TO DO" she shouts at me.

"Ive got it...oh hang on it's stuck"..whats stuck"..."the grappling hook"...i motor back to see the boat hook wedged into the chain on top of the large mooring buoy!!!!!!

Anyway this all ended with her getting not the dingy and getting the boat/grappling hook back and finally picking up the buoy as asked.

Later on in the week after many days sat listening to wind and rain we are about to leave Cowes,. So we slip the lines and i shout to her..."please bring the bow line back and don;t throw in on the bow" I ask her to do this every single time but get ignored..she dopes what she thinks is best...but not based upon any reason.

So of course she throws the bow line onto the bow and walks onboard at the stern...i move on slight but with an wind blowing on i use a little thruster to get the bow right...yes you've guessed it..a gust of wind...a rope slips off the deck and into the thruster..BANG..there goes another shear pin!!!!! A row then followed with me being told that she will do it her way and i can !"£$% off!!!..nice!

Another day she wants to anchor in Osborne bay for lunch..."Its' too rough and you won't like it" i say "Just do it" she says...so i do and shes feeling sick within a few mins!

So the moral of the story is simple...i need a new woman!
 
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Marriage is like a hurricane.

Starts with a lot of sucking and blowing......by the end you lose your boat! :):):)
 
Enjoyed that, sounds very familiar, we regularly have what we call "F off" moments usually arriving or leaving somewhere, I also get "why cant we have normal holidays like everyone else" but only in the heat of the moment, I'm very lucky to have someone who loves sailing it as much as me.

These have done more for our marital harmony than anything else, no more shouting up and down the boat, highly recommended.
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Bloody brilliant and so reminiscent of my own experiences. I must admit although she answers back and always tries to somehow make her mistakes my fault, I know she knows I am right. I think your problem was with the initial training of your woman :D I am on my 3rd wife so far and trained her up pretty well having learnt from past mistakes. My experience is that women as a whole have a severe lack of humility. We gave em' the vote and it's been a slippery slope since then.

Quick Joke; what reduces a women's libido by 70%? Scroll down for answer.













Wedding Cake
 
What's even worse is when the kids are on her side

Hide their phones and show them the error of their ways.

BTW - it may be too late for you now but leading up to getting the boat I repeatedly said, "there is only one skipper on the boat, me. You can discuss things later but when I ask you to do something you need to do it". Said the same with my kids and it's early days but so far so good. I did have one incident with my 19 year old son preparing the bow line. I told him to pass the end with the eye over the rails from the foredeck and then through and around the cleat. He argued that he knew what he was doing. I said, "do it that way which saves passing it all through and back over the rails". He went to answer back and I shouted, "Just do it". He did it. I explained the reason why later so that we don't have a similar problem to you regards dropping the rope in the water whilst moving. The biggest challenge I have at the moment is getting SWMBO to remember to bring the bow line back along the side so that she can reach it once the stern line is secure. This is particularly important as the cleat on the bow is a fair way past the end of the finger.
 
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Very funny, I trust some of you guys don’t let your other halves near the forum ;)

I guess I married the right woman! Can’t imagine a better partner to have on the boat - but we did work together, perhaps that helps?

I can certainly think of plenty of other couples who are equally passionate and proficient in regard to their boating....

Our son on the other hand is only proficient with the sound system, the fridge and sun pads - the rest is a mystery to him...
 
bad skippers make bad crew, I was taught.

Harsh, have a heart the man's hurting. It's the man's lady wife and so not the same as training up someone else. For example, it is a similar situation as trying to teach your wife to drive. Luckily she could already drive, to a fashion anyway. She does have a habit of trying to remodel the aerodynamics of the vehicle as well as aiming and managing to hit a dear and end up on her side in a ditch. Think she was looking for toads. Those were two separate incidents by the way.
 
Very funny, I trust some of you guys don’t let your other halves near the forum ;)

I guess I married the right woman! Can’t imagine a better partner to have on the boat - but we did work together, perhaps that helps?

I can certainly think of plenty of other couples who are equally passionate and proficient in regard to their boating....

Our son on the other hand is only proficient with the sound system, the fridge and sun pads - the rest is a mystery to him...

I actually read the original post out to mad bird as well as my reply. She has a sense of humour - most of the time.
 
Very funny, I trust some of you guys don’t let your other halves near the forum ;)

I guess I married the right woman! Can’t imagine a better partner to have on the boat - but we did work together, perhaps that helps?

I can certainly think of plenty of other couples who are equally passionate and proficient in regard to their boating....

Our son on the other hand is only proficient with the sound system, the fridge and sun pads - the rest is a mystery to him...

We work together, still cost me IPS remote & seakeeper :o
 
How can you train someone who does not know her left from right..seriously..i have to point which side i want things!

Also someone who makes up random names for things...bloody grappling hook i give you!!!!...and lets not forget that she needs glasses to drive but hates to wear them so won't wear them while on the helm! This often results in conversations such as the below!

"Is that boat coming towards us"..."No dear its a block of flats on the shore".

or

"Please can you go around the back of that yacht right in front of us"..."What yacht"
 
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