Dealing with panic.

[Bergman]

Never had this at sea but once got stuck in a blizzard whilst driving over Nth York moors.

4 of us in the car and hopelessly stuck. Spent ages pushing and messing about when one lad suddenly said do you think we’re going to die. My response was no but we may miss our pint.

This freaked him completely and he set off to try to walk out of it – almost certainly a fatal thing to do. We had to physically restrain him i.e. floor him with a left hook.

Half an hour later he was fine – even forgave the punch up.

 

[graham]

Re: Had it, done it ... got the T shirt ....

Nigel I think anyone would panic at the sight of a headless sailor in the cockpit..

 

[Mudplugger]

What sort of trick cyclist are you then?, where is the caring, considerate, comforting persona that we have come to know! beating them round the head with a winch handle indeed. That sir, is a violent action

 

[Lakesailor]

Re: Had it, done it ... got the T shirt ....

[ QUOTE ]
Besides which, if the skippers pissed himself with fear I think the others are entitled to worry.....

[/ QUOTE ]

 

[Andrew_Fanner]

I have found that singing helps, and the sooner they calm down the sooner I stop. Nursery rhymes for kids, more "adult" stuff for grownups. Or Tom Lehrer for anyone.

 

[Lee_Shaw]

Ta for the replies. It seems I didn't do too badly in light of the replies, just calming her down and getting her into a berth. I explained her situation to her and a look of terrified resignation came over her face, I could see in her eyes she was sure she was fish food. Then she slept. We picked up a mooring as soon as we could, but she was terrified even on that, in virtually no wind. Strange.

In common with some of the replies, when she got ashore she suddenly went really embarrassed and acted like nothing had happened, even talking about our next trip! /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif /forums/images/graemlins/crazy.gif

I like the idea Andy but I leave singing out for the good of mankind. Can't hold a tune to save my life. In fact my engine carries a tune better.

 

[Goodtimegirl]

Are there no posts from anyone who is brave enough to admit they have been scared too? Having suffered the odd panic attack myself I can empathise with the lady in question. I console myself that us ladies have a heightened sense of survival. That's why we have less accidents I suppose. My panic attacks also involve gripping the spray hood, willing land to appear and praying, I hate the boat, hate HWMBO. The best thing is to go below and sleep, or helm so she feels that she has some control.
When reaching land (oh! the relief) the kettle goes on, I make it up to very patient husband and his beloved boat and off we go again.

 

[landaftaf]

yup - sounds like my wife ......

so now I got a wife and no boat

working on getting a boat now ..... wife looks at me like I have 2 heads

funny innit

/forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[graham]

lee I think she must in fact be a very brave lady to be willing to go again.

Not talking about it doesnt sound good though.I would gently broach the subject and ask her what if anything you can do to make her more comfortable about sailing.

After that take it very easy at first if all goes well build up to going further afield.

As a child I got trapped under an upturned dinghy ,wouldnt go near a boat for a few years then gradually got back into it.Possibly she has had a simmilar fright in the past that you dont know about.

 

[BrendanS]

There doesn't need to be a prior experience to trigger such panic attacks. A classic example is motorway terror. Ever increasing numbers of experienced motorists, often driving 30+k miles a year, suddenly pulling over on the hard shoulder and abandoning car, or simply unable to continue until rescued by police.

 

[Lee_Shaw]

Graham, she is indeed a very plucky young lady. She rides horses extremely well and is a total tom-boy. Knowing her like I do, I think she feels that she has failed a little and would like to prove to herself that she can do it.

I think I will gently broach the subject next time an opportunity arises as you advise to see if there was anything that I did wrong or that increased her anxiety. Probly getting out again on a similarly short trip in similarly clement weather will sort her out.

Whoa! Goodtimegirl, 10 posts in 2 years I'm honoured, but that was a good one.

I have been scared in a boat so I kinda knew how she felt. That was down to the skipper coming across as less than competent on a 22' yacht that looked as if it was cobbled together. For example, all the wiring was just taped to the ceiling, bus bars just screwed to the ceiling etc. About 2 hours into the crossing the skipper came out of the cramped cabin dragging half the shoddy wiring in his wake. So we lost comms, fixed GPS, internal lighting and all the instruments. He refused to use his steaming lights instead of his running lights when we were steaming saying it doesn't matter, and countless other problems such as the whole cabin reaking of petrol. Every passing hour of the 12 hour passage I offered a prayer of thanks. I was convinced the boat was gonna shake to pieces or explode.

My yacht is well founded though, so I would be interested to get an opinion from her as to whether there was something that I could have done to help alleviate her fears earlier on, or in briefing. When all's said and done she was my responsibility and I feel like I failed.