Daft things people do to boats...

Channel Ribs

Channel Ribs

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Joined
11 Mar 2006
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The island of Alderney
www.alderneymarine.com
My firm ethics usually prevent me from comenting on the bizarre things we see within the boating community, but...

A guy brought a speed boat in for a GRP repair, it seems the previous owner fitted a fire extinguisher bracket to the floor - conveniently by the helm. Sadly he used quite long screws and went all the way through to the watery stuff under the boat! /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif

Can anyone trump that?
 
Just before selling his boat this guy decides to renew the big extinguisher in the saloon by the companion way steps. The new extinguisher is somewhat larger and has a different bracket. He fitted the bracket beautifully - in just the right position to prevent the cover being removed from the battery compartment! Didn't realise until the purchaser pointed this out. Stupid or what???

(admission: it was me wot dunnit.)
 
Previous owner of a Starlight 35 I bought had straightened out the swan neck in the exhaust hose in the lazarette locker ( to make more room !) Not picked up on the survey or by me. First trip out, F7 big following sea, engine full of sea water. Nice. /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif
 
My boat had previously had an RYA Training Vessel certificate. Came with lots of bits incl harnesses and lifelines. The bolt rings in the cockpit were too small for the lifelines to clip on. /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif Obviously a tick-list inspection. Shackles now fitted /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif
 
Looking at a boat for sale at a brokers about 4 years ago , It had been converted to wheel steering.

It looked like after they had fitted the wheel and binacle The cockpit locker seat/lid was catching the wheel .
They had cut a slot about 2 inch wide in the lid to clear the wheel but then the lid caught on the binacle itself so had had to cut out a very large flap to make it clear this. as you can imagine on a fibreglass lid this looked awful with bits of rubber strip to try to keep water out.
The steering quadrant was fouling the inside of the transom in the aft cabin so a slot was cut out through the fibreglass and a wooden box fitted outside the transom for the quadrant to swing into
/forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
Pete
 
Old survey on my boat suggested that the batteries should be secured in the bilge....

....which the owner duly did using duct tape. :-)
 
I have seen someone filling their fresh water tank with a hose connected to a tap in the galley of the same boat.......he was there a long time. Mind you it was on a ditch crawer.
 
I fitted speakers in the cabin on the bulkhead right behind the steering compass..... yes I should have known better /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif
 
One of the stupidest things i ever saw was a small yacht where the owner had fitted a secondhand engine, its sump was too deep to fit the boat so he had cut a hole in the bottom of the boat through which the sump protruded.
he had then fibreglassed a rough moulding over the hole.
this goes to prove there is nothing quite so ingenious as a congenital idiot!
 
I know this post probably in the category of Daft things people do on boats but it really made me laugh out loud /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

It also made me remember a trip many years ago when three friends and I chartered a boat over Easter Weekend. We had managed to persaude 3 young ladies to join us who had never been sailing before. The yacht had all mod cons and was plugged into the shore power as we arrived. We were looking very seamanlike as they arrived on the pontoon and announced " We didn't know what to bring, so we brought wine". Anyway it was a relaxed and slightly late departure the next day. I could hear hairdryers being run off the numerous 240v sockets linked up to the shore power. Anyway, we finally got away and having exited Portsmouth harbour pointed roughly in the direction of Cowes, it was time for a cuppa. "I'll do it" shouted one of the female crew. After 15 minutes I went down to see if all was OK as the tea never appeared. There she was with an electric kettle plugged into a 240v socket. " A watched kettle never boils they say" she said.
 
The builders can do it as well as the yotties. My old Halmatic 30 had a cockpit sole hatch retained by two latches - except that whoever cut the hatch sawed in the wrong place so that there was no GRP lug left for the latch to grip on. The more the functional latch was tightened, greater the gap gaped at the other end.
My current Rustler 36 (bought when 5 years old) was prone to heads overflow. There were no siphon-breakers in the loops, so I put a couple in. After this the Jabsco pump wouldn't operate at all. Close inspection showed that the inlet swan-neck loop was between sea and pump, so it simply sucked air through the siphon-breaker. All became clear; the loo had been installed in the "above waterline" mode, totally imappropriate for a rustler. An hour spent switching the hose connections and re-running the hoses solved the problem. Easy to imagine the scene at Orion Shipyard: "The lad can fit the heads pump on the 36 - all the instructions are in the box!" What puzzles me is that the first owner put up with it for five years without investigating what was wrong.
 
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The builders can do it as well as the yotties

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Right.
In our boat, lack of ventilation by the ECS Ventair on the fwrd hatch was an issue- but in spite of that, water would come in just by spraying on it with a hose. On close inspection, the baffle part had been mounted upside down.


Years ago, I watched as a traditional Dutch craft was launched after a complete refit by a 30+ years-experienced professional boatbuilder. After the launch, the skipper started the engine, and put it in forward gear to proceed to his box. The boat went backwards and hit a motorboat. Turned out the builder had fitted a wrong-handed prop!
 
Our previous boat suffered from the infamous Volvo gearbox stripped spline problem. As we entered Isle Chausey!!! /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif
Made it to Granville. Engineers fitted new one. Launched. Force 6 wind up the transom. Boat still held by spring to pontoon ready to be released when moving backwards.Engaged reverse. Boat didn't move. Hmmm. Few more revs. Christ that wind is strong. MORE revs. No backwards motion!. Try forward!!!!! Boat motored backwards beautifully! Engineers had connected linkage round wrong way.

WORST part (apart from the bill!!) was approaching the berth in 20K knots of wind on the nose and having to remember to push the throttle FORWARDS to stop!
 
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I have seen someone filling their fresh water tank with a hose connected to a tap in the galley of the same boat.......he was there a long time. Mind you it was on a ditch crawer.

[/ QUOTE ]
Maybe, he had just treated the tank and was trying to give it a stir?

That would not make it as stupid, but then, an ex. (at home) on seeing the bucket under the kitchen sink, strategically placed to catch the dishwater, while I was out the back clearing out the S-bend; Picked up the bucket and emptied it, can you guess?
 
One of my favourites was reproduced in PBO many years ago entitled something like 'Convert your Centaur into a Motorsailer'
How...? Why by bolting 2 cars seats from the local scrappie onto the top of the cockpit seats of course! :-)

On my own boat the builder installed a bleed/supply pipe between the stern tube and the tail of the engine input seacock, thus rendering the seacock completely useless.. I realised this while trying to change the engine impeller whilst afloat: after filling a couple of buckets and throwing them back from whence they came it dawned on me that I was trying to drain the ocean into a bucket.
 
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