Blondes

[paulineb]

A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"

The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky voice, the
woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir,
1 - The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 - The bouncer is a blonde gal.
3 - I'm a 6 feet tall, 200 pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 - The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5 - The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.

Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares, "Nah, . . . not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times"


Pxx

 

[BarryD]

Ahh Humour....

Much better than the anti-powerboater threads... Nice one Pauline I actually smiled!

Go left, YOUR OTHER left for pete's sake
(IMHO, BTW, FWIW and NWGOI)

 

[Col]

Or, how about..............

Two women go out one weekend without their husbands. As they
came back, right before dawn, both of them drunk, they felt the urge
to pee. They noticed the only place to stop was a cemetery.
Scared and drunk, they stopped and decided to go there anyway.
The first one did not have anything to clean herself with, so she took off
her panties and used them to clean herself and discarded them.

The second not finding anything either, thought "I'm not getting rid of my
panties..." so she used the ribbon of a flower wreath to clean herself.

The morning after, the two husbands were talking to each other on the
phone, and one says to the other: " We have to be on the look-out, it seems
that these two were up to no good last night, my wife came home without her
panties...".

The other one responded: "You're lucky, mine came home with a card stuck to
her butt that read, "We will never forget you"



http://www.arweb.co.uk/argallery/album02/

 

[Divemaster1]

Political Correct;

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED CITIZEN.
2. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
3. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
4. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is A PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
5. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
6. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
7. She is not HORNY - She is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.
8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
9. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
10. She is not a SLUT - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
11. She does not have PREMIER LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
12. She is not a TWO-BIT SLAPPER - She is a LOW COST SERVICE PROVIDER.


HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE
FACILITY.
2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - HE INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE
DESTINATIONS.
4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
5. He is not a CRADLE SNATCHER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL
RELATIONSHIPS.
6. He do es not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY
HORIZONTAL.
7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL
INVERSION.
8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED

Divemaster1

 

[wakeup]

Re: Or, how about..............

Why do blonde women have bruises around their belly buttons after sex?

Because blonde men ain't so bright either.

yada yada..