A confession

In my experience, the magnitude of my transgressions appears to be inversely proportional to the size of the audience. On the rare occasions that I make a perfect berthing and I look around for the admiring faces, there's not a witness in sight. Whenever there are crowds around, i can be relied upon to provide plenty of unintentional entertainment.
Mike

I think one may be particularly sensitive to the possible presence of others when one makes a mistake. When I hit lock gates - engine cut out, no reverse - the only visible witnesses (the lock keeper was discreet) were an elderly non-sailing couple leaning on the lock rail, who looked on phlegmatically as if they saw it every day.
 
This innocent-looking scene is where I attracted our biggest audience. I was approaching this bridge in Burdaard in Friesland when my gear cable parted and I lost reverse gear. With the choice of hitting the bridge or the shore, I chose the shore and sank the child's red dinghy on the left, just scratching my bow a little. The whole village turned out to see what the English idiot had done and one of them was an engineer. He brought along some tools and effected a repair shortly after this picture was taken (which is why we are facing the wrong way). Unfortunately, he got it wrong, and while manoeuvring to turn, my increase in throttle in reverse gear caused us to shoot forwards into a rockery, taking a chunk out of the gelcoat but doing little damage to the garden. My 'engineer' made good his error and the village dispersed, realising that there was no more entertainment to be had.
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Look ,if we’re playing Confessional Bingo , there are some very accomplished players on here, myself included ?
So, enjoy yourself and your boat and crew . It gets better and better??
 
Every marina and river has its idiot , this one lurks on the Orwell and stour , I’ve not ventured down the Deben yet , ? . I must learn to accept help when offered and stop trying to get myself out of the S..t solo .
Actually, I think you have exactly the right attitude already. You don't sound at all like an idiot. Far better to be able to get oneself out of trouble rather than have to look elsewhere. That's very often the cause of real problems.
 
When something goes wrong, the only difference between us WAFIs and the master of the Ever Given is that the whole world meedia doesn’t rock up en masse to pnotograph our embarrassment. If we are lucky we may make it to you tube.

Actually those make good entertaining.
 
For a thorough grounding can I recommend a little rill just at the SE end of Gillingham Reach? You think you're in deep enough water because the sounder says so, then you tack straight onto the mud bank it runs through...

For added embarrassment ensure you have a couple of fellow club members aboard and get dragged off the mud by the erstwhile Police launch.

When it happens just accept it as one of those things. You can cringe about it some 30 years later, just like me.
 
Why do people describe themselves as "idiots"? One should not start in that vein but introduce oneself as more of a "beginner" if one has to indicate that one is at the start of the learning curve. But never "idiot". I hate those books that are entitled some task or other for "Dummies". If i was a "Dummy" I would not be on that path in the first place. I never buy that series of books out of principle.
So start on a positive note. Tell people that you are a beginner, or that you are looking for advice. Perhaps you had a "near miss", or "close call", But NEVER admit to being an idiot.
We will form our own opinions re that as time goes on ;)
 
Actually, I think you have exactly the right attitude already. You don't sound at all like an idiot. Far better to be able to get oneself out of trouble rather than have to look elsewhere. That's very often the cause of real problems.
Cheers MC , your a good bunch of sailors on this forum , my last voyage started off badly , myself and my fellow crew member reversed out of a very tight pontoon mooring . The wind got us and the stern took control , we recovered after fending off etc . No persons or boats were damaged and we were about to congratulate ourselves when a hysterical female boat owner started screeching at us , “ don’t you damage my boat , don’t you dare damage my boat “ . Embarrassing to say the least , if anyone catches my boat I just fend them off and tell them not to worry about it .
 
Tasape, contact with boats in marinas to be avoided at all costs even if you’re well fendered if you don’t want to become the pontoon outcast!

Not saying this was you, backing out of a Marina berth and attempting a 3 point turn like you’d do in a car is often doomed to failure but you see it all the time, along with the subsequent drama.

If the parking arrangements are stressful, I’d ignore any advice that’ll be given here that works on other peoples boats but maybe not yours and invest in a day of own boat tuition, concentrating on pontoon bashing.

Elite Sailing etc do them.

It’ll be the best money you spend…the sailing bit is easy as you know!
 
A few years back, one May Bank Holiday we'd had a long trip to Bradwell (from West Mersea :)) and an expected blow from the north arrived earlier on the Monday morning than forecast... We were in the butt end of the marina and in the landward end of that lane. Started to back out and the prop kick swung the stern to the North, so I tried to turn the bows through the wind... No chance. So I finished up going astern all the way to the fuel berth alley, which is wide, and with all of the 47 bhp applied and full starboard wheel applied managed to finally get the bows through the wind! I was prepared for a stern first trip home!
 
A few years back, one May Bank Holiday we'd had a long trip to Bradwell (from West Mersea :)) and an expected blow from the north arrived earlier on the Monday morning than forecast... We were in the butt end of the marina and in the landward end of that lane. Started to back out and the prop kick swung the stern to the North, so I tried to turn the bows through the wind... No chance. So I finished up going astern all the way to the fuel berth alley, which is wide, and with all of the 47 bhp applied and full starboard wheel applied managed to finally get the bows through the wind! I was prepared for a stern first trip home!
My saildrive combined with a limited rudder movement makes it hard to kick the bow through the wind, so progress astern out of a marina is quite a common event for me. My home berth tends to encourage usage this too. The longest run I’ve had to do this way was at St Helier, out of the drying pad in the corner, with about 15 knots blowing across, maybe 200 yds. It is a skill that everyone should be prepared to acquire, and really not that hard, except in the case of Tom, Dick, or Harry’s boat of course.
 
A few years back, one May Bank Holiday we'd had a long trip to Bradwell (from West Mersea :)) and an expected blow from the north arrived earlier on the Monday morning than forecast... We were in the butt end of the marina and in the landward end of that lane. Started to back out and the prop kick swung the stern to the North, so I tried to turn the bows through the wind... No chance. So I finished up going astern all the way to the fuel berth alley, which is wide, and with all of the 47 bhp applied and full starboard wheel applied managed to finally get the bows through the wind! I was prepared for a stern first trip home!
I think reversing out is the way to go with my vessel , she pulls hard to port , when facing the aft . The yards boat handlers confirmed my findings during a recent lift out , fortunately due to their exemplary boat handling skills they used the characteristic to their benefit. Their advice was , either walk her out , point the bows in the required direction and allow your crew member to climb aboard , then off you go . Or let her pull you around add rudder as needed reverse away from other boats and then sail off as normal . The latter will be practiced away from the boatyard and other craft and under instruction .
 
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I find an unpowered craft hired from Hunter's yard on the broads is great for learning. Most of the other hirelings are mobos and as solid as rock. We had to bring ours back upwind through a narrow twisty dyke a few years ago in a blow and the yard made no fuss at all, they just sent a lad out in a stem dinghy with a pot of varnish to touch up all the boats, we'd all done the same!
 
I find an unpowered craft hired from Hunter's yard on the broads is great for learning. Most of the other hirelings are mobos and as solid as rock. We had to bring ours back upwind through a narrow twisty dyke a few years ago in a blow and the yard made no fuss at all, they just sent a lad out in a stem dinghy with a pot of varnish to touch up all the boats, we'd all done the same!
I did much of my learning on the Broads, in an assortment of boats. My last trip, before we started sea sailing was in a four-berth Leading Lady from Potter. I borrowed a nephew to make up the numbers and we weaved enginelessly and happily around for a week, taking in Horning, the Ant and Horsey Mere. A quant pole and a mop are good pieces of equipment for fending off dangers.
 
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I did much of my learning on the Broads, in an assortment of boats. My last trip, before we started sea sailing was in a four-berth Leading Lady from Potter. I borrowed a nephew to make up the numbers and we weaved enginelessly and happily around for a week, taking in Horning, the Ant and Horsey Mere. A quant pole and a mop are good pieces of equipment for fending off dangers.
It was Meadow Dyke, on the way back from Horsey Mere that was our undoing.
I recommend investing £10 in the National Trust mooring at Horsey Windpump. Money very well spent.

The ugly boats can't pass upstream of Potter Heigham!

The biggest danger I found was giving way to mobos whilst beating. I once did, fell on to the wrong tack, and managed to ram a moored hireboat. Never again!
 
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It was Meadow Dyke, on the way back from Horsey Mere that was our undoing.
I recommend investing £10 in the National Trust mooring at Horsey Windpump. Money very well spent.

The ugly boats can't pass upstream of Potter Heigham!

The biggest danger I found was giving way to mobos whilst beating. I once did, fell on to the wrong tack, and managed to ram a moored hireboat. Never again!
You’ve got the wrong idea. You don’t give way to motor boats; you make them wait. We acquired quite a train on boats astern on our way up Meadow Dyke in the Leading Lady, 30+ feet plus bowsprit. We were racking, nephew with the quant pole and wife with the mop at the bow, until I took pity on our followers and nudged our bow into the reeds on the weather bank. Someone on one ofthe boats said as they passed, “What a pity. We thought you were doing so well up till then”
 
You’ve got the wrong idea. You don’t give way to motor boats; you make them wait. We acquired quite a train on boats astern on our way up Meadow Dyke in the Leading Lady, 30+ feet plus bowsprit. We were racking, nephew with the quant pole and wife with the mop at the bow, until I took pity on our followers and nudged our bow into the reeds on the weather bank. Someone on one ofthe boats said as they passed, “What a pity. We thought you were doing so well up till then”
My foolish give way was in Horning village.
On a decent stretch of river the mobos can get by easily by sticking close to the bank, this one came at me mid channel and I should have rammed him rather than waking up the unfortunates in the moored boat! I think it was 9am on a Sunday morning, I saw the curtains pulled back, but I was away before anyone was after me!
 
wow, this thread grew while I looked away for a bit... it seems that some people got what I meant and, unless I'm misunderstanding, some seem to have thought I identify as a regular recurring idiot... which was not what I was getting at at all, so apologies for any confusion. I suppose I believe every day has its designated idiot and so long as it's not me very often I am doing ok.

Sometimes I make mistakes. Mistakes when sailing can be very very public. Sometimes I'm not making a mistake but I suspect what I'm doing might look daft to the unsuspecting passer by. I try to judge other sailors' apparent oddities in that light and I still think I've seen worse mistakes than I've ever made myself yet... but most of the time I am cautious bordering on timid because I know there are some real dangers out there as well as a lot of potential embarrassments. I can cope with a fair bit of embarrassment :-)

James_Calvert... I think I know where you mean at Gillingham reach. That bit by the round forts where it sometimes feels like you can sail and touch the grass at the same time also makes me slightly nervous though I suspect it's not really a trap.

The Broads sound great, would love to go there some day.
 
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