What makes you laugh and cry ...

[Guest]

We all have our funny stories and experiences ... we have our pain as well .... share your stories with all of us ....

I'll start with my Father, God Bless him .....
We used to have a tidal mooring in the old days of Fareham Creek, Hampshire. We motored down on Friday from Sussex to the boat, with the 'old man' saying we would go ashore early in the morning to get gear etc. ready to have a w/end away on the IoW.
So sleep on boat in creek Friday night. Up early, I mean early saturday morning, row the 2 mile upriver to the pontoon ..... of course there's about 20 yards of black oozing, stinking creek mud between us and the pontoon.
Old man rolls up trouser legs, puts painter over shoulder and proceeds to launch himself into the mud up to his knees. Now in the dinghy is mum and I ..... so 'dad' now looking like Mr. Bogart in African Queen drags dinghy and us across the mud. And it just so happens that Mr. and Mrs. High almighty in the club are arriving to go out to their boat .... click click went the camera !!

So what about yours ??????

C'mon lets hear all those mistakes, laughs and things that we can all learn from !

 

[iangrant]

I mentioned to a good friend that had never sailed that we would be returnng home in the evening, he said but it will be dark, what do you do about that? I replied "turn the lights on"
True!!

Ian

 

[Boatman]

Lying in the sun moored 15 meters from the beach falling asleep to be woken up by kids on the beach screeming, look up to see inflatable about 3 meters up the beach, some knot or other I am still not sure (Other half has lots of photographic evidence to show everyone)

 

[Guest]

Friend reckons he’s Yachtmaster material ( he’s a day skipper) so we set off in a charter boat for me to put him through his paces before he signs up for a course.
Coming down Southampton Water from Town Quay in the dark he says
“ Which side of that big ship should I go ?”
I’m pretty certain he registered my contempt of the question when I replied “The wet side!”
Oh, and don’t worry, he’s going to attempt Coastal NEXT YEAR !

 

[Guest]

We sailed my old Lysander up to a pontoon in Conyer Creek, perfect landing. Went ashore for quick lunchtime pint. On return I let go the bow line and my friend let go stern line. At that moment the cord which raises the rudder blade was picked up by the outboard. Outboard stalled of course but the tension in the line meant that the outboard could not be raised so he couldn't clear the prop. To prevent us drifting across the creek, I grabbed the pontoon and found myself with my feet hooked on to the pulpit and my hands gripping the pontoon - the rest of me was stretched out, inches above the water with the boat sideways across the creek. It was at this point that a large motor cruiser loomed up and the skipper announced that I was in his way! There is always an audience when things go wrong.

 

[Rabbie]

I hope you are not eating when you read this....!

.....But I didn't know whether to laugh OR cry last Tuesday, when I struggled to get the Porta-Potti from its lair to empty it, when the top half detached itself from the bottom AND the outlet cap became detached, spilling the contents all over the cabin floor!. Talk about gobsmacked - should I curse, cry, laugh - this was definately my worst 'sailing' experience ever. It took me 1 1/2 hours to clean up - half of that was in the showers with a complete bottle of Dettol!. Motto: do not trust catches on your Porta-Potti. Result - 3 days of my holiday anchored by the stern to clear the pong of disinfectant!.