Well I think its's funny!

Artie

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Well I think its\'s funny!

One day in the future, Osama bin Laden has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him.

"I dont know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list but I have no room for you. You have to stay here so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got a few folks who were not quite as bad as you so I'll let one of them go and you can take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves."

Osama thought that sounded pretty good so he agreed.

The devil opened the first room: in it was Richard Nixon and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty handed - over and over again. Such was his fate in hell. --- "No" bin Laden said. "I don't think so - I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think I could do that for eternity."

The devil led him to the next room: in it was Tony Blair with a sledgehammer smashing rocks time after time.--- "No - I don't think so" said bin Laden "I have trouble with my shoulder and I would be in constant agony all day long"

The devil opened a third door. In it Osama saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head and his legs in a spreadeagle position. Bent over him was Monica Lewinski doing what she does best. -- Ossama looked in disbelief for a while then said "Yeah I can handle this"

The devil smiled and said, "OK Monica, you'r free to go."

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paulineb

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noooooo - this is funny

A woman gets out of bed one morning, looks in the mirror and says to her husband

"oh god, I'm fat, horrible and covered in cellulite. Please pay me a compliment"

he replies

"your eyesight's spot on !!"

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aztec

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Re: noooooo - this is funny

yep that's funny too!!

what about this...


my Mrs (Mrs Woman) walked into the bedroom all chuffed, wiggled about a bit... like you lot do, and said "I have lost three pounds!"

thinking like the good husband i was when we married... replied "nah it's ok love... they're behind you"

i do try to use these funnies... just to keep her angry with me.... so i know where i stand..

not quite as good as "you're better in bed than your sister!"

only used that one once... she didn't take any notice... doh!

best wishes, steve (the drunk one)

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DepSol

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Re: Well I think its\'s funny!

Thats good but I liked the story about my Dad better, had my family in stiches.

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claymore

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Re: noooooo - this is funny

Bloke kept thinking he was a Moth so he went to see the psychiatrist. Waited ages then went off to another room along the passage.
The chap inside said - 'can I help you?'
'Yes I hope so - I think I'm a moth'
'Ah - you don't need me - you need to see the psychiatrist along the passage'
'Yes - I know that , but I saw your light was on'

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aztec

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Re: noooooo - this is funny

AAAAAhHHHH exelent i liked it!!!

bloke goes to the doc....

"doc i think i'm turning into a pig!"

don't be daft says the doc, what makes you think that?

well says the bloke, "see my nose?, it's short and upturned and looks a bit like a snout!"

i'm sure your just imagining says doc.

"that's not all" says the bloke, "my hands are changing, they seem to be longer and thinner, see!"

well, says the doc they do seem to bee a little unusual, but i'm sure it's only temporary.

"well, what about this?" he turns round, drops his caks, bends over and wiggles a little curley tale.

"bloody 'ell" says doc, how long have you had that?

"about a WWEEEEEEEEEEKKKKK"

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TonyGerrard

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Re: noooooo - this is funny

Sandwich walks into a bar - barman says "sorry mate, we don't serve food"....

Dyslexic man walks into a bra........

There are millions more! Oh No..........

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muchy_

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What about this

My wife looked in the mirror the other day, " look, she said. I getting old fat and ugly, pay me a compliment will you" your eyes are spot on I said :)

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ccscott49

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Re: Well I think its\'s funny!

What does DNA stand for?...........................National Dyslexic Association!

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Alistairr

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Re: noooooo - this is funny

I think the dyslexic jokes are great,

Anymore???



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claymore

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Re: noooooo - this is funny

Bloke went to a Roman Themed fancy dress party dressed in a goat

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Steve_D

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Re: noooooo - this is funny

I think all of these Dyslexia jokes are mean, cruel and evil........

Mind you they can't read them so what the hell!!!

Steve D

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Alistairr

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Re: noooooo - this is funny

Nasty/forums/images/icons/laugh.gif/forums/images/icons/laugh.gif/forums/images/icons/laugh.gif


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