tcm
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Turning engines off at sea etc : What\'s the solution #94
You are total idiot boat skipper, possibly a charter skipper (hah!), and having read some nice mag about uk-med trips you set off from Gibraltar in a rubbish old single engined boat with dodgy mechanicals. You have no idea of the route back to the UK, and are a bit scaredy anyway so decide to set off er well, not today but how about tomorrow?
The crew are useless so they agree to your daft plans and go off to get lashed cos you've decided to set off at 10am as though the trip is in the solent, you nit.
The useless crew don't help dig around the engineroom to discover possible problems, nor do they do any chartwork, like the fab crew that one would find on Mobo Chat forum. Yes, somehow you've manged to get FIVE know-nowt morons as "crew" for a serious voyage.
So anyway, the next morning you set off North er west er well whatever and it's blowing 18 knots almost directly on the nose. Or is it from the stern quarter. Not easy to tell is it? Not from this text it ain't.
Of course, your stupid choice of nanky old boat is as bad as the choice of crew. I spect it's late August when you make this trip, just in time for a decent gale, you berk. Remeber Fastnet Disaster? that was late august too. Moron.
Anyway, following your utterly imbecilic tendencies you turn off the engine every six hours. None of the crew say er just a minute as anyone with any experience or even common sense would do - they are fine if you turn things off and on cos they haven't got a clue. I was at sea with an editor of a mobo mag and he def advised against turning engine off even when it went a bit groany.
But these days well, turning engines off is suddenly called "good practice" and it's going to get printed in a flippin magazine as such with god knows what results.
So, unsurprisingly (bearing in mind every other decision you've made so far) the engine becomes a bit busted and now you've got a problem cos oil lashed about and alrms going off.
You can half-fix the engine to hobble to the coast and/or make vhf calls i suppose, although regardless of how you make it out alive you can expect a good deal of talking about this screwup behind your back for years to come.
Perhaps you got idiot crew because all the decent crew knew you were a wassock to start with, eh?
So here's the question - who's the biggest idiot?
a) You?
b) the crew?
c) or the magazine editor for (promising to) print that it's "good practise to turn off an engine every six hours".
Hm?
Answers on postcard please.
You are total idiot boat skipper, possibly a charter skipper (hah!), and having read some nice mag about uk-med trips you set off from Gibraltar in a rubbish old single engined boat with dodgy mechanicals. You have no idea of the route back to the UK, and are a bit scaredy anyway so decide to set off er well, not today but how about tomorrow?
The crew are useless so they agree to your daft plans and go off to get lashed cos you've decided to set off at 10am as though the trip is in the solent, you nit.
The useless crew don't help dig around the engineroom to discover possible problems, nor do they do any chartwork, like the fab crew that one would find on Mobo Chat forum. Yes, somehow you've manged to get FIVE know-nowt morons as "crew" for a serious voyage.
So anyway, the next morning you set off North er west er well whatever and it's blowing 18 knots almost directly on the nose. Or is it from the stern quarter. Not easy to tell is it? Not from this text it ain't.
Of course, your stupid choice of nanky old boat is as bad as the choice of crew. I spect it's late August when you make this trip, just in time for a decent gale, you berk. Remeber Fastnet Disaster? that was late august too. Moron.
Anyway, following your utterly imbecilic tendencies you turn off the engine every six hours. None of the crew say er just a minute as anyone with any experience or even common sense would do - they are fine if you turn things off and on cos they haven't got a clue. I was at sea with an editor of a mobo mag and he def advised against turning engine off even when it went a bit groany.
But these days well, turning engines off is suddenly called "good practice" and it's going to get printed in a flippin magazine as such with god knows what results.
So, unsurprisingly (bearing in mind every other decision you've made so far) the engine becomes a bit busted and now you've got a problem cos oil lashed about and alrms going off.
You can half-fix the engine to hobble to the coast and/or make vhf calls i suppose, although regardless of how you make it out alive you can expect a good deal of talking about this screwup behind your back for years to come.
Perhaps you got idiot crew because all the decent crew knew you were a wassock to start with, eh?
So here's the question - who's the biggest idiot?
a) You?
b) the crew?
c) or the magazine editor for (promising to) print that it's "good practise to turn off an engine every six hours".
Hm?
Answers on postcard please.
