Totally stupid boats

stefan

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Re: jfm 58 or 59

I meant the 58 like you have. Great boat, checked in Cannes couple of weeks ago and earlier at the Dusseldorf show.
Super steering pos. both up and down! (Funny how the Italians can be so underdeveloped in that department).
Prob is I have rebuilt m'ol 55 so extensively I'll have to use it as a coffin (not too early I hope) unless I give it away.

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jfm

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Re: jfm 58 or 59

Get one stefan - the 58 I mean. It really is a great boat. Easily best flybridge in class. Gludy is quite wrong, there are no engine service problems.

Praps i sound biased cos I have one? I'm not, if I thort it was crap I'd say so. Ask tcm when he is back - he is staying on our boat now

Most are med specced. There's one for sale lately in Sweden with diesel heating. It is Bjorn Borg's boat. Dunno if still for sale

If you buy new you can just trade-in the 55 can't you?

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longjohnsilver

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But surely that can't be right jfm, this time you've gone too far, altering the shape of the bottles means you'll have to drink all of the contents first after which you've got no chance of cutting to shape!

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jfm

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Dremels - yikes

When I posted that earlier I meant dremel out the holes that the bottles fit in. But you remind me of when tcm got the Lep 23. His bottles wouldn't fit, and he didn't want to dremel the nice Leopard cabinets, so he dremelled the corners off Gordon's dry gin bottles. Ground glass everywhere.

This wouldn't worry me, were it not for the fact I'm in London and tcm is on my boat right now, a bit pissed (based on a conversation with him 1 hour ago), and there's a dremel on board.....!

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longjohnsilver

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Squadron 55!

Oho that sounds like bad news, the whole shape of your boat could be changed! Was he sounding bored as well as pissed?

He didn't really change the shape of the bottles did he. Please tell me you're joking!

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jfm

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Re: Squadron 55!

Dead serious. He dremelled the bottles. Coliholic egged him on I think

Worried about our boat now. Might be a pile of dust. Will have to sweep it all up when I visit sunday. There was a bzzzzzzing noise in the background as he spoke. He also said "one of the ceiling halogen lights wasn't working so I hit it hard and it's definitely broken".......

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BrendanS

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Re: Squadron 55!

I shouldn't worry. The odd broken lamp is nothing compared to what he could do if tried to re-enact the Mirabella scenario, complete with forums? <g>

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tcm

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Re: jfm\'s sq 58 dismantling and full test

yep. i agree with jfm. The sq 58 is dead easy to dismantle no problem at all. harhar!

ahem, that was a joke axshully.

I am now expert at not driving jfm's sq 58, since the weather was crap when he left, and then followed by 2 days rubbish weather, then 1 day really awful weather, so we didnae bother going out in it, and cabbed around the local area spending hideous amounts of loot, wd've been MUCH cheaper if we had been driving the boat, but anyway.

The other things was that the special diesel tanker man sed he wd turn up, but didn't, every day, so he can't be faulted for consistent levels of sevice eh?

But the telly was fine and I watched the french taxi/heist dvd, which is excellent. Also, the icemaker seems to work vair nicely too!

The loos are much quieter than some earlier fairlines eg older targa 48's with screaming macerators, altho the quietness is actually only from insde the bathroom - from the bedroom it sounds as though someone has detonated a small explosive device and then started the engines. If this doesn't wake you up, then the light switch arrangement definitely will cos the bathroom light is next to the aargh overhead lights jeez sorry dear dear oops done it again, did i wake you up? anyway sorry dear.

what else. Oh yes, Fairline STILL continue to supply braided mooring lines. This feel all lovely to the touch, but is in fact flippin hopeless as mooring lines, cos it is specialy designed not to stretch and hold a sail up, hence in any swell like wot was in Monaco it is a right ole racket, and what with me be all complainy, jfm wouldn't believe me so i went off and bought ridiculous luxury-priced black mooring three-strand rope, and all the jerking and snatching noise from the lines immediately stopped. So, if you're watching fairline, pls start supplying the 3-strand mooring lines has elasticity, and also 3-strand is cheaper (cept in Monaco. probably).

we like

> jfm's emma who get loads of drinks, and then some more
> nice sq58 big bathrooms with ooh touchy feel granitey with "old gold" bits in
> nice yet apparently bombproof carpet
> nice airy living space in sq58 esp when chucking down outside
> not having the slightest clue bout the engines cos we didn't turn them on, nor the galley cos jfm's emma made breakfast, and then we went out till quite late every day.
>the Indian restaurant in Antibes and the Quaie des Artistes in Monaco, both of which we visited twice inside 5 days . Also, the Stars and Bars in monaco is okay as well.

we don't like
>the bathroom lights arranged in the stupid places as above.
> Oh yes, the doors to the cabins are v nice area, clever smart design, BUT the one to the day heads has no sign on it saying "this is the bog" so everyone incl me and magnum have to open all the doors and oops sorreee, then try the next one and oops sorree etc.
>the mooring lines, as above, cos fairlinies don't seem to go on boats much, and/or maybe the rope manufacturers are nitpots, but i moaned about this 5 years ago, and again 4, 3 and 2 years ago and they still have the sodding stupid braided lines so all the fairline owners think boats are much more uncomfy at the quayside than they should be.
> the passarelle could be a bit longer couldn't it? Cos it only just nearly reaches the back of the boat when fully extended, which is a bit stingbaggy and not as useful as if it yerknow, went to the quayside ahem.
> the washing machine is busted again even tho jfm "fixed"it, but not my fault, definitely. Cos of course, i don't know where it is, like at home really, ahem.
> Another thing is jfm's berth is a bit slappity slappity on the bows when it's windy, cos it points into the main fairway. But after all the drinks as above, this only means staying awake an extra ten seconds, and not really a Sq58 problem, to be fair.


So, here endeth very detailed 5-day Sq 58 test test, during which (except for the first 2 days defore jfm jumped ship) I didn't actually turn on the engines and go anywhere, or look at the engines, or any charts, or go on the flybridge cos it was raining.

I think this needs a bit of work to be expanded into a full MBY test, with a lot of photoshop, and i wd need to drone on a fair bit about the layup weights more than normal as well to pad it out.
 

ari

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Re: jfm\'s sq 58 dismantling and full test

I think you're just about there re turning it into a MBY full boat test to be honest.

All thats left to do is scatter the phrase "breathes more easily" about a bit and add the sentence "the sea was flat calm when we conducted our sea trials, but criss crossing the photographers RIB wake showed no obvious vices and so all probably very good".

Oh, and remove all of the "don't like" comments, except one just so's you look like you're being fair and even handed and definitely not pandering to one of your biggest advertising clients, oh no, definitely not!

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tcm

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coliholic and the gin bottle

Hm, i think i ought to be allowed to put the record straight. It is true that coliholic and i whizzed down to france to see the lep when it was one day old, had a free lunch and then zoomed off, and then drank far too many drinks and made the boat look a bit of a mess within 12hours of taking delivery, but this is only cos of coliholic and self being on board not, because of the dremel.

About midnite we found the nice booze-shaped holes. Amazing! How on earth did they know what drinks swmbo and self like? They must've followed us around secretly and then passed word back to the builders. Later, i found out they make those holes on all boats so just pure fluke really.

Anyway, the blimmin gin bottle didn't fit so we got the dremel out and only tried dremelling the gin bottle a bit, which didn't work, before coliholic said this is a bit daft innit and so then I started on the perspex holder bit, whilst coliholic is variously raving about how his sodding Freeman 24 had these as standard and everything fited nicely, and then more raving about the boat being under 12 hours old and here I am attacking it with power tools whilst sloshed. BUT the holes are now the right shape, but only for the smaller bottles, and not for larger bargain bottles.

Hm. Not sure this has totally exonerated me, really.


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