The worst skipper?

[clouty]

For those of you who crew.

What's the worst skiper you have ever sailed with? No names, no lawsuits.

To kick it off:

I came up to take my watch at 2am, as planned. A two handed passage to Falmouth from the Isle of Wight. We were two thirds of the way through Lyme Bay.

"I haven't bothered to plot our position, we can do that in the morning. It's too dark now. I have made a note of it on this scrap pad"

"So you just want me to record our position on that notebook?"

"Yes, and keep this course, steer 260. It will take us straight into Falmouth Harbour"

I look around, and see Start Point Light. To Port. A long way off still, I am glad to say. But what I do say is (because I am aware by now of his macho insecurities)

"Fine. I've got her. Your turn below. I'll call you at 5 unless I need you before that"

And he goes below.

I plot our position, set a course to go south of Start Point by 3 miles. Don't know the waters, see, so no clever stuff this time about inshore passages. Better angle off the wind, anyway. I alter sheets and course. He's fast asleep already. Thank goodness.

I call him for his watch at 5am. I get enormous grief for altering course, but by now, we are round Start.

A few disasters later we arrive in Falmouth. I am biting my tongue and just keeping shtum and safe.

We moor up, and I try to explain my concerns.

Rattles were thrown out of prams.

I took my kitbag, found the sailors mission, had a couple of beers and found out about the trains, and proceeded back to Shoreham

Instead of going by boat to Gibralter.

Lucky escape!

<hr width=100% size=1>clouty

 

[Evadne]

Did he ever make it to Gib? Or did he try the straight route?
A fishing friend (angling, not a "real" fishing boat,) once went out with someone who plugged the autopilot into the GPS, set the course once outside Portsmouth harbour, put the motors on cruising speed then went below to crack a couple of beers for his mates. Sorry, put the kettle on. Fortunately someone looked out of the window and asked "Wouldn't it be better if we went around the Isle of Wight instead of through it?"

As I've almost never sailed on other peoples' boats, the worst skipper I've ever sailed with is me.

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[Peppermint]

Re: Oh! Dear. Where to start.

Could be the bloke who took our money for a week on a 60ft thing. Turned out that only two of us could sail. Me and him. The boat wasn't ready. Needed a lift out to fix the cutlass bearing. Got it back in and set off, in the dark, for Alderney with no briefing, no forecast into a channel blow. Only one of the crew and a panel of the mainsail needed stiches when we got there.

Could be another charter skipper I knew who found out the skill level of his crew and then made sure that the most experienced did nothing for the whole trip. He proceeded to come the old sea dog for the beginers and clearly enjoyed himself. Then he seduced one of the girls, handed the boat and crew over to me and stayed in his cabin or took a hotel in port to develop the relationship. We had a good cruise following this turn of events.



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[snowleopard]

how about the skipper who wouldn't let anyone else touch the sheets during an atlantic crossing (crew included a yachtmaster instructor). watermaker broke down and crew was on water rations but he still insisted on washing his stainless deck fittings in fresh water. autopilot broke down and crew had to hand steer but he didn't take a turn. crew member had wife revovering from major surgery and wanted to make a link call home charged to his own account - skipper refused use of radio. wouldn't sail 7 miles to mainland for crew's departure, crew had to charter private aircraft to get to airport.

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[milltech]

"As I've almost never sailed on other peoples' boats, the worst skipper I've ever sailed with is me."

I must disagree, I'm sure I am.


<hr width=100% size=1>John
http://www.on-line-marine.com

 

[Rowana]

Pardon me asking, but how come you were on his boat in the first place ??

Sounds like you made the correct choice in Falmouth, anyway

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[tome]

Ouch, he sounds truly dreadful. What was the outcome? Hope he's now sailing single-handed. He deserves to.

Worst skipper I had was a saint by comparison.

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[Cantata]

My worst made a supper consisting of tinnned potatoes, tinned carrots, and....Fray Bentos pie. Honestly.


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[snowleopard]

i would never wish such misfortune on another but i wasn't too cut up to hear that he was in grenada a few weeks ago.

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[ShipsWoofy]

Worst skipper I 'worked' for, for a time.

36ft trawler, just the two of us working. One day the hydraulic winch died, properly, no chance of a running repair. We had a 12 fathom net on the bottom, this is quite a large net for two people to work. We had been towing for about an hour and a half so net full of fish and other junk.

About a mile and a half away from us another trawler we both knew, drank in same local, friends etc. I suggested we called him and asked him to winch our gear in for us. Oh no, says this old skipper, he reasoned it would make us look bad and unable to cope.

So on with gloves pulling the net in inch by inch. Oiled wire is a bit of a shit to pull in and I found wrapping a length of rope around the wire would give some purchase. The skipper also had angina, he was popping pills like smarties for the three or so hours it took us to pull the net, chains, wire, otter boards back in. I thought a few times when he swaggered to sit down for a rest I was going to end up with a dead skipper on a boat anchored to the bottom from the stern.

We did it and I remember thinking once the net was home that I too wanted to die.

The whole episode was entirely down to arrogance IMO, it would have taken probably an hour off the other trawlers day to assist bringing in our gear. A couple of pints that night would almost certainly cured that.

So there is my nomination.

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://big-blunkett.blogspot.com/>Say no to compulsary ID, vote out Überfuhrer Blunkett</A>

 

[milltech]

Having spoiled you on that day, what did he feed you that was bad?

<hr width=100% size=1>John
http://www.on-line-marine.com

 

[johna]

He might have been the worst skipper but the supper was good.

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[TheBoatman]

<<<<My worst made a supper consisting of tinnned potatoes, tinned carrots, and....Fray Bentos pie. Honestly.>>>>>

You need to be very careful making statements like that or you'll find yourself up before the 'butters court charged with high treason<s>.

Peter.




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[piscosour]

Since I sail mainly single handed and give myself most of the worst jobs with no thanks or reward I must be the worst skipper.

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[paulskent]

Worst skipper I ever sailed with was the First.

Took us out on comp crew training for first ever sail (in a big boat) in a force 7 from Largs to Lamlash. After one of the crew collapsed from dehydration, due to sickness, he agreed to let us off the boat so that we could get the ferry back. Highlight was him putting in a mainsail reef on deck with a heel of about 50 degrees and no safety harness. If he had gone over the side we would not have know where to start !! HAd a fag in his mouth the whole time and was pretty much unintelligible.

Having said all of the above, I learnt quite a bit about what not to do.

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[clouty]

Reave_White and Jim Irving

He spent some time in Falmouth, hopefully putting in place some repairs I'd recommended, but that he had rejected at the time, and did make it as far as the Canaries, but failed to join the arc, which was the original plan. He was back in the UK a couple of months ago.

Sailing can be a steep learning curve, and arrogance and booklearning can blind people. I hope that I helped to open his eyes a little.

and to answeer Jim Irving:

He was a member of the local yacht club, I'd done a bit of canvaswork for him, and saw him around a lot.

One night, at the bar, he said gloomily
"I'm never going to get that boat away from here"

"Why not" say I

"I can't find anyone with the time to help me get her to Gib"

So believing he was a good bloke (and basically he is) and being a sucker for an ocean passage, I first took a jolly to Eastbourne with him, seemed ok, and then we worked on passage plans, finalising gear and provisioning. I missed several problems, and others were misrepresented to me. I did persuade him to go via Falmouth, rather than cutting across Ushant. Did my first Biscay crossing that way (but that's another story) and I knew that was not a good idea.

It was a learning experience for both of us.


<hr width=100% size=1>clouty

 

[Evadne]

No it can't be, I don't think I've ever sailed with you.

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[Talulah]

My wife would like to nominate me.
Maybe I could start a thread 'The worst galley slave ever!' Then I could nominate her!

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.boat-share.com>http://www.boat-share.com</A>

 

[jimi]

I am the worst skipper ever, no sense of rhythm and I hate rhymes llike this

I am a little Dutch girl dressed in blue.
Here are the thngs I like to do:
Salute to the captain, bow to the queen
Turn my back on the submarine.
I can do the tap dance, I can do the split.
I can do the holka polka just like this.


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[Peppermint]

Re: Bet I\'m worse

My Dad nearly wept when I was in a boxing gym. Which was a nice balance to strike with all of the other blokes laughing.

I can get stones to pitter patter over the water though.

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