The three most useless things in a boat

[HoratioHB]

I was always told that the answer to this was a Naval Officer, a sheep and a stepladder.

Any other ones???

However I've already failed on one of the above and the sheep is out of the question. But as we are in packing up house mode at the moment - I do actually have a lightwight stepladder. The daft question then, is should I take it? We will almost certainly be laying the boat up abroad on occasions and need to get on board - or is this something yards usually supply as part of the service?

 

[Abigail]

Well - it depends on the ladder. We have just acquired one to make a nifty passarelle (thanks to Englander in barcelona who actually built it!). It's straight rather than one of those A-frame shapes.

Otherwise we've found ladders not worth the trouble of carrying. Lots of yards either have them or there is a hardware store nearby with cheap ones for sale. You might have a big enough boat that i

 

[Abigail]

Well - it depends on the ladder. We have just acquired one to make a nifty passarelle (thanks to Englander in barcelona who actually built it!). It's straight rather than one of those A-frame shapes.

Otherwise we've found ladders not worth the trouble of carrying. Lots of yards either have them or there is a hardware store nearby with cheap ones for sale. You might have a big enough boat that it wouldn't be a blasted nuisance of course!

We DO carry and use two plastic saw horse trestles which are invaluable for all sorts of jobs, light, fold down to go in a locker and don't corrode. But you can't climb aboard a boat on the hard with them.

Oh, BTW I've always thought a spirit level was one of the three.

 

[Channel Ribs]

I cannot comment on your three examples, but my rule of thumb is that every item must have two seperate uses in order to justify its exisitence on a boat. The saw horses sound well up to the job, perhaps if you got smaller ones with a wooly top section and added a bit of gold braid?

/forums/images/graemlins/smirk.gif

 

[HoratioHB]

Surely a horse would be worse than a sheep??

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[ozcruiser]

The Naval Oficer is the all time No 1 most useless followed by a lawnmower. 3rd place how about half a scissor or a rubber ruler.

 

[Talbot]

[ QUOTE ]
The Naval Oficer is the all time No 1 most useless

[/ QUOTE ]

That probably accounts for how a boat manned by naval types actually won one of the round the world race legs back in the days before the boats cost more than the normal defence budget of a small nation.

I will admit that there are some Naval Officers that I would not trust anywhere near the wheel of my boat, but there are a bigger percentage of non-naval officers who fall into the same category.

 

[theguvnor]

Snooker Table ????

 

[KellysEye]

Never found a yard ex-UK that doesn't have ladders.

The most useless things on cruising boats are ALL the crap marine products which have a design life for weekend sailors.

 

[HoratioHB]

[/ QUOTE ]That probably accounts for how a boat manned by naval types actually won one of the round the world race legs back in the days before the boats cost more than the normal defence budget of a small nation.

[/ QUOTE ]

Actually they won the first around the world race not just one leg in the Nicholson 55 'Adventure'.

Kellys Eye - thanks for that - the nugget I was looking for. The ladder is off to the recycling centre along with lots of other rubbish, the cat and my business suit.

 

[ChrisE]

I always thought that ir was 'a naval officer, a wheelbarrow and an umbrella'. CAn't comment on the first one but the other two would certainly get my vote.

 

[Troutbridge]

An 8hp outboard, garden maintainance manual and shoe polish.
You've been retired long enough for the training to have worn off.

 

[pat_detente]

We circumnavigated with an electric cooker ring replacement kicking around in a locker. (Left over from moving out of the house and doing the maintenance for tenants) and a set of three seat belts for back seat of a car (we did come to use these in a van we bought for driving around in OZ, so they weren't actually useless)

 

[PlanB]

asparagus kettle, salad spinner, rice ball - all requested by visitor about to cook supper (plus cooking chopsticks)

 

[Talbot]

[ QUOTE ]
Actually they won the first around the world race not just one leg in the Nicholson 55 'Adventure'.

[/ QUOTE ]

Didnt want to rub it in!

 

[Talbot]

[ QUOTE ]
I always thought that ir was 'a naval officer, a wheelbarrow and an umbrella'. CAn't comment on the first one but the other two would certainly get my vote.

[/ QUOTE ]
I have seen a golfing umbrella doing sterling service as a bimini so perhaps there is some utility for a brolly

 

[Sequoiah1]

Naval Officer.

Umbrella.

Rabbit.

 

[mandlmaunder]

Have carried an A frame ladder on our Cat for 5 years only used it on empty beach's at low tide when the dink dont work so well, but have been grateful everytime

 

[Troutbridge]

Rabbit stew? Who was that circumnavigator in the 1930'3, took a dog with him called 'spare rations'?

 

[heerenleed]

[ QUOTE ]
Snooker Table ????

[/ QUOTE ]
Not if it is a gimballed one.... /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif