ParaHandy
Active member
Whilst visiting a racecourse recently, I was invited to participate in a syndicate which would own, train and race a horse. The costs of such an enterprise are not dissimilar to boating, I understand. The gentleman was irish/scouse git and after discussing his hopes of a new shirgar we got down to business. The procedures for acquiring and owning a nag are somewhat similar to purchasing a boat:
Firstly, in horse language, you employ a vet to “survey” the nag. He ensures the beast has 4 legs etc
The provenance of a horse seems to be quite important. Buy one with good history
Colour is less personal choice as the greys seem to get most backing. The wife put her money on only grey horses whereas I studied the form – she, at least, had some money left
Like chandleries, bookmakers have several tills for paying and only one, hidden away, which pays out
Chosing a crew or jockey seems to be a matter of finding an undernourished irish waif
Vast quantities of potions, lotions and unguents have to be purchased to keep the animal happy; osmosis doesn’t seem to be a problem although, mostly, they’re in the glue factory before old enough to establish this as a common fault
Stupendous quantities of fuel are required – typically oats – administered by people who, over time, look not unlike their charges
Motivation is quite difficult; unlike a boat, you can not dangle the threat of sawing it’s knackers off (gelding in horse speak) if it doesn’t perform. There is no boating equivalent unless somebody knows better … ?
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Firstly, in horse language, you employ a vet to “survey” the nag. He ensures the beast has 4 legs etc
The provenance of a horse seems to be quite important. Buy one with good history
Colour is less personal choice as the greys seem to get most backing. The wife put her money on only grey horses whereas I studied the form – she, at least, had some money left
Like chandleries, bookmakers have several tills for paying and only one, hidden away, which pays out
Chosing a crew or jockey seems to be a matter of finding an undernourished irish waif
Vast quantities of potions, lotions and unguents have to be purchased to keep the animal happy; osmosis doesn’t seem to be a problem although, mostly, they’re in the glue factory before old enough to establish this as a common fault
Stupendous quantities of fuel are required – typically oats – administered by people who, over time, look not unlike their charges
Motivation is quite difficult; unlike a boat, you can not dangle the threat of sawing it’s knackers off (gelding in horse speak) if it doesn’t perform. There is no boating equivalent unless somebody knows better … ?
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