Teak Chippings

[jimi]

I have a friend who bought a teak cockpit table, however to fit it into his boat he's had to prune it a bit, in fact its now about 60% chips & shavings. He's bitter,twisted and weeping at the though of the wood that he's bought and not used. To comfort the poor old soul I'd appreciate any ideas on how to reconstitute the surplus and to what use the reconstituted teak could put.

Yours in eager anticipation
Uncle Jimi

 

[StugeronSteve]

Just scatter them in the cockpit, should look good and keep the weeds down.

 

[aitchw]

Would give it a sort of up-market spit-and-sawdust feel. Might be a plan for a trendy new pub chain based an good auld Glasgae standing only till you fall down bars.

 

[Sgeir]

[ QUOTE ]
good auld Glasgae

[/ QUOTE ]
Eh, Glesga perhaps?

 

[dralex]

He could go fishing and then teak smoke his catch- it should be a lot better than the tea leaves and rice that were suggested to me. If he had any spare hot air ducting, he could also make a cold smoker for doing lovely smoked salmon.

He could also mix it with a load of Evo stik and spread it on his side decks as a wonderful low cost alternative to treadmaster.

Another use would be to sprinkle some on ice cream and pretend it's chocolate shavings.

 

[jimi]

The elderly gent in question, whilst spending a lot of time fishing has a very poor fish to time ratio. I'd supect a smoke yer own fish smoker would turn out to be a further waste of time,materials and probably fish!
Was thinking of something like teak kiev, whereby teak reshaped and reconstituted with brown sikaflex could be fashioned into drinks holders or something?

 

[claymore]

Iread somewhere that teak chippings and shavings can be ground in a coffee grinder to an almost paste-like consistency. If this is then mixed with oil - olive oil would be fine, it can be used as a skin colourant. I would suggest you mention this to the ageing one as he may find it helpful to rub a small amount of the paste onto his bottox. This would darken them and so reduce the glare frae his bare cheeks when he insists on daein that ridiculous trooserless foredeck shuffle he seems to have perfected.

On the other hand you might point out that he's lucky to have any chippings at all because about a week ago this very night the whole shooting match looked in grave danger of being forever consigned to a permanent state of revolvement around the circle line when the daft auld goat forgot he'd got the table and bumbled off without it.

 

[dralex]

[ onto his bottox.] /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

Wouldn't he use bottox to make his cheeks more pert, or to possibly give his lips more pout?

 

[FlyingDutchman]

Does your friend have a bottle of cognac, cigars and a fireplace?

 

[zefender]

Given the geographic origins of your poor friend, I suggest separating the chippings into quarter pound portions, wrapping them in a bap and sell them on as McTeaks.

 

[claymore]

Ahh you obviously know him well