Scuttlebutt Sailing Course

iangrant

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After careful consideration and reading some excellent advice on this forum, I was hoping that perhaps there was a sailing course that could be arranged.

For me it needs to cover;

avoiding IoW Ferries, jetskis and the associated coll regs,

boat handling (a couple of forum members insist I should do this)

flag etiquette

How to post on a forum non offensively

Any one else like to make up a crew or add to the course content if we can find some instructors?

Ian
 

FullCircle

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I can accomodate all of those requirements in one course & seminar. Please send your cheque for £1000, and I will give you the detail of this very exclusive limited course, lunch and refreshments included
We can also, by private arrangement, give you a refresher on heavy boat control in reverse, and traversing narrow channels. This will be held on the main channels of the East Coast. This module is at the one off price of £500. Bring your own HR.
 

Twister_Ken

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Ian,

Should the course go ahead, I'd be happy to join you - especially for the crash stop (how to make 10 hp halt 4 tons of boat in 5 seconds) and moron cone sessions, but also for crossing busy TSS lanes if that could be incorporated. In recompense, I'd be happy to teach a module on anticipating the movements of, and consequently avoiding vexatious, expletive-deleted-inducing situations with racing yachts.

Yours aye,

A fellow cretin.
 

fireball

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I would be delighted to join in .... I can give tutorials on how to anticipate the seemingly random movements of asymmetric racing dinghies and the correct method of nicking all their wind. /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
 

sarabande

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As an Appendix to the course, there should be a Crew Psychology module, starting with Feeding and Hydration.

It is very important to include the correct use of the Fray Bentos tin, safe application of the corkscrew and bottle opener, positioning of the barbecue on the stern gantry, how to programme your GPS using pub and restaurant waypoints (Shortest Path Analysis is critical, here), the EU standard bacon sarnie and its regional variations, and the Trouville method of culinary survival.

Disregard any pleas from Forumites for the addition of a section relating to laying up fine burgundies and clarets in the bilge.
 

Evadne

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I have a doctorate in removing diesel from bilges, and can give a course on Chaos theory and its application to yacht wiring, if that's any help. In return, I'd like to sign up for Curmudgeonliness and Pedanticism for beginners.
 

akirk

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[ QUOTE ]
This module is at the one off price of £500. Bring your own HR.

[/ QUOTE ]

There seems to be a mix up between what you say here and your 2007 brochure - what you meant to say was bring your own PWC /forums/images/graemlins/cool.gif
 

sarabande

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I thought Chaos Theory always explained the present situation, and was not used for forward planning ? That is unless you are a fan of "fit for purpose" evolution which entails acceptance of Intelligent Design. I prefer to employ Mandelbrot fractals in boat electrics design.

Perhaps we need a conference to establish a European standard? Such a topic deserves at least three weeks in the Seychelles.
 

Heigaro

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Can I do communications - heavy on CG messages :-
Radio checks.
Passage reports for passages from own berth to fuelling berth.
Timing of weather requests for 5mins after general all ships weather broadcast.

/forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
 

ParaHandy

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Crash stop? Hullo there, you've already passed the HGV (11 tonnes +) test which included oral communications so you've a dispensation for .. erm .. lightweight white vans ...
 

MarkGrubb

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Anchoring: Theory and Practice. This topical and comprehensive course will equip the student with the necessary knowledge and skills of anchor selection, rope/chain combination and choice of rode, bottom type and holding, scope and swinging room, technique and etiquette.

The course will also introduce students to the history and themes that underpin contempory debate in anchoring and the selection and use of ground tackle. These include hull shape and design, topside windage, cruising area, reliablity of the modern diesel, and the use of a riding sail.

Specialist topics such as kedging off, storm anchoring, and the mediteranian moor will be covered in a series of optional modules.

On completion the student will receive a signed certificate, embossed anchor ball and permission to append the initials 'AChr' to their posts in order that other forumites can be confident of their competence and command of the subject.

Completion of the course is a mandatory requirement for membership of the Scuttlebut Institue of Anchors and Moorings (SIAM)

All enquiries to AvastMark, AChr SIAM.
 

whipper_snapper

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[ QUOTE ]
Timing of weather requests for 5mins after general all ships weather broadcast.

[/ QUOTE ]

And for advanced users; asking for the latest weather on ch16 while it is actually being broadcast on the working channel.
 
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