Sail solo or crew for friend?

[Vega1447]

OK, a First World problem perhaps but here goes.

I sail my Albin Vega 27 solo but often take friends along for a sail if they ask.

One friend has a similar sized yacht which he can't sail solo & rarely has crew for.

So now and again he asks to come along for a sail with me. Great.

But he expects that I "in return" will come and crew for him.

I much prefer to sail my own boat, with or without crew.

So how do I explain this to him without falling out? He's a nice guy but has imo a blind spot on this topic.

 

[dylanwinter]

brilliant conundrum

so many moral aspects to it....

it needs some careful thought

time to walk the dog and ponder

D

 

[jac]

Interesting one.

When he suggests it, why not say that you would love to help him out - but that as you already take hike sailing maybe he could return the favour by helping you antifoul or something.

Trying to get him to raise the point that he thinks he is helping you by crewing for you so a fair return is you crewing for him. If you can make him see that if you crew for him you're doing him 2 favours and that isn't really fair.

 

[Searush]

Would it be possible to help him set up for & learn to manage on his own? Go with him "just in case" a few times but let him do it as if solo.

I realise there may be other reasons than lack of confidence or experience, but offer the idea anyway.

 

[bush boat]

Suggest he starts reading this forum. He might come across this thread. Problem solved.

 

[robertt]

I would occasionally just go along sailing with him. Preference aside, it can't be all that bad and fosters good relationships.

 

[Uricanejack]

I would occasionally just go along sailing with him. Preference aside, it can't be all that bad and fosters good relationships.

+1 consider it just another good deed. If his company is agreeable how bad can it be. Let him know you enjoy sailing by yourself.

 

[dylanwinter]

Suggest he starts reading this forum. He might come across this thread. Problem solved.

blimey!

that is like divorcing via twitter

 

[Sandy]

So now and again he asks to come along for a sail with me. Great.

So he asks you to take him out...

No problem - make it clear that he can come out any time he wants and if you fancy a sail with him you will ask him.

 

[trapezeartist]

Just be honest. Polite, but tell it like it is. Life is too short for dancing round the subject.

Of course, if he doesn't sail solo due to a lack of confidence or expertise, you could follow Searush's advice and help him out properly by giving him that confidence. Someone did it for me with single-handed berthing: I did everything, but he was there to help just in case it all went wrong.

 

[Kelpie]

Sail in company?

 

[doris]

blimey!

that is like divorcing via twitter

Excellent. Much cheaper that using lawyers.

 

[mjcoon]

blimey!

that is like divorcing via twitter

Do you have to tweet three times to make it effective?

Mike.

 

[Dipper]

Sail in company?

+1

Go out with him a few times and show him how he can manage on his own then next time it's fair weather suggest you both go out on your own boats. He then has you near by to give him confidence even if you can't physically do much to help.

Of course, this only works if his boat is moored near yours.