petem
Well-Known Member
Come on Matt, don't be shy you must have gone. What was it like? Any totty? Do tell.
Rodriguez Rendez-vous
- Thread starter petem
- Start date
tcm
...
I'm afraid that everyone was sworn to secrecy, and I can't say a word.
petem
Well-Known Member
Don't tell me - if you told us you'd have to kill us. Trust you were flying your Boatchat Burgee with pride!
tcm
...
Big-Boat rallies - the truth
First off - I didn't go. Second off - I wasn't invited. Thirdly, I was in Palma, and none of the Palma lot went. Fourthly, big-boat rallies are totally and utterly dull. Oh yes they are. Dull dull dull. Big boats arebn't driven by twonks like me who twat about in the engineroom and devise interesting ways of noiseproofing, bilge pumpery and testing the fire hose. They're driven by skippers who shut the eff up, and deal with everything that need tying, operating, opening, shutting, painting, cleaning ...in fact everything except eating and drinking. As a result, a conversation with another leopard owner goes like this:
tcm: hi! Same Boat! This is hull number 24 - and yours?
Massive Old German Bloke: Nummer 10.
tcm: And...how long have you had it? Does it run well?
MOGB: Five years. Ve are very pleased it. Mein skipper reports no problems.
tcm: Ah. And where have you come from today?
MOGB: Golfe Juan. [i.e 10 miles away,where almost all the other leopards are based too]
tcm: aha. Well, um, Excellent !
MOGB: Gut! Auf wiedersehen!
tcm: Righty Ho...
MAGB disappears shopping in town whilst skipper cleans his boat. The end.
See? No lending each other tools or bits of shore power leads - we've all got loads. No wingeing about the rusty bits or falling off bits cos the skipper deals with it and daren't complain. No yacking in the pub about the massive cost of everything cos they're all so flippin rich they don't care. The boats are so big you'd have to really shout to start a conversation. Also nobody has any kids cos they're all sixtyish. And, truth be told, there aren't many problems with the boats. So, um, not sure what you'd do at a Rally. Go to the pub? Nope - all pubs are much nastier than the boat with much worse service and most are a lot less roomy. What about a chat about cars then? No - everyone has or has had loads of cars, all new, can't remember anything particular about them and yes they all go very fast indeed. No, they've no idea how fast cos the driver does that for them, and anyway they flew down and the driver mettem at the airport and so on...
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that big-boating is crap. But to make new friends its easier when you find someone that needs some help with lines, or is have a crap time mooring, or doesn't know where the shower block is or at least is seeking refuge from the weather or the confines of a smallish boat. Any and all of these topics can launch a valid conversation. If the boat is huge and comfy and works and loaded with lots of drinks and food such that life ashore is worse and you never need step off, and the skipper shields them from any boaty problems...why do they need to talk to anyone else?
First off - I didn't go. Second off - I wasn't invited. Thirdly, I was in Palma, and none of the Palma lot went. Fourthly, big-boat rallies are totally and utterly dull. Oh yes they are. Dull dull dull. Big boats arebn't driven by twonks like me who twat about in the engineroom and devise interesting ways of noiseproofing, bilge pumpery and testing the fire hose. They're driven by skippers who shut the eff up, and deal with everything that need tying, operating, opening, shutting, painting, cleaning ...in fact everything except eating and drinking. As a result, a conversation with another leopard owner goes like this:
tcm: hi! Same Boat! This is hull number 24 - and yours?
Massive Old German Bloke: Nummer 10.
tcm: And...how long have you had it? Does it run well?
MOGB: Five years. Ve are very pleased it. Mein skipper reports no problems.
tcm: Ah. And where have you come from today?
MOGB: Golfe Juan. [i.e 10 miles away,where almost all the other leopards are based too]
tcm: aha. Well, um, Excellent !
MOGB: Gut! Auf wiedersehen!
tcm: Righty Ho...
MAGB disappears shopping in town whilst skipper cleans his boat. The end.
See? No lending each other tools or bits of shore power leads - we've all got loads. No wingeing about the rusty bits or falling off bits cos the skipper deals with it and daren't complain. No yacking in the pub about the massive cost of everything cos they're all so flippin rich they don't care. The boats are so big you'd have to really shout to start a conversation. Also nobody has any kids cos they're all sixtyish. And, truth be told, there aren't many problems with the boats. So, um, not sure what you'd do at a Rally. Go to the pub? Nope - all pubs are much nastier than the boat with much worse service and most are a lot less roomy. What about a chat about cars then? No - everyone has or has had loads of cars, all new, can't remember anything particular about them and yes they all go very fast indeed. No, they've no idea how fast cos the driver does that for them, and anyway they flew down and the driver mettem at the airport and so on...
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that big-boating is crap. But to make new friends its easier when you find someone that needs some help with lines, or is have a crap time mooring, or doesn't know where the shower block is or at least is seeking refuge from the weather or the confines of a smallish boat. Any and all of these topics can launch a valid conversation. If the boat is huge and comfy and works and loaded with lots of drinks and food such that life ashore is worse and you never need step off, and the skipper shields them from any boaty problems...why do they need to talk to anyone else?
boatone
Well-Known Member
Re: Big-Boat rallies - the truth
Oh well......theres nothing else for it then...you'll just have to carry on making do with us lot.
Now then, if you threw massive party on Leopard and chartered private jet for us lot we could make lots of noise and make out having thorougjhly good time (cos we would be , wouldnt we?) and then other lot eg MOGB etc would get dead jealous cos you'd have all the action and they'd want some. Then you'd explain that true fun of big boats only possible if no skipper so's all skippers would get fired and there'd be great fun and games watching them all cock up mooring and getting to next place and looking for corkscrews etc etc. All jolly like................
Oh yeah, almost forgot...........and I'd do a special piccie feature for Hello mag and that would really p*ss 'em all off.................
<A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.boatsontheweb.com/galleryframes.html> My P32, BoatersGallery, VolpenUsersGroup</A>
Oh well......theres nothing else for it then...you'll just have to carry on making do with us lot.
Now then, if you threw massive party on Leopard and chartered private jet for us lot we could make lots of noise and make out having thorougjhly good time (cos we would be , wouldnt we?) and then other lot eg MOGB etc would get dead jealous cos you'd have all the action and they'd want some. Then you'd explain that true fun of big boats only possible if no skipper so's all skippers would get fired and there'd be great fun and games watching them all cock up mooring and getting to next place and looking for corkscrews etc etc. All jolly like................
Oh yeah, almost forgot...........and I'd do a special piccie feature for Hello mag and that would really p*ss 'em all off.................
<A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.boatsontheweb.com/galleryframes.html> My P32, BoatersGallery, VolpenUsersGroup</A>
petem
Well-Known Member
[url]www.ratemyboat.com[/url]
Surely only a matter of time before you add it to your portfolio of web sites?
Surely only a matter of time before you add it to your portfolio of web sites?
petem
Well-Known Member
Medium size boat rallies
Some where in the back of my anally retentive mind I seem to recall that you did at least one Balearic Fairline rally? Was that any better?
Some where in the back of my anally retentive mind I seem to recall that you did at least one Balearic Fairline rally? Was that any better?
petem
Well-Known Member
No spin the bottle then! NM
.
.
boatone
Well-Known Member
Re: [url]www.ratemyboat.com[/url]
bit beyond me , that one?
<A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.boatsontheweb.com/galleryframes.html> My P32, BoatersGallery, VolpenUsersGroup</A>
bit beyond me , that one?
<A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.boatsontheweb.com/galleryframes.html> My P32, BoatersGallery, VolpenUsersGroup</A>
longjohnsilver
Well-Known Member
Wot, sacked the skipper again TCM?
How many is that now, or have you held onto one for more than a month or so? Is this the norm for skippers over in the Med, and what about the young nubile crew, is she still performing all the expected duties.
Come on Matt do tell, could be the mobo chat soap opera!
How many is that now, or have you held onto one for more than a month or so? Is this the norm for skippers over in the Med, and what about the young nubile crew, is she still performing all the expected duties.
Come on Matt do tell, could be the mobo chat soap opera!
tcm
...
Re: Normal size boat rallies
ah well yes the baearic rally, completely different. Otherwise known as the Drinkathon.
Firstly, 90% of the boats are Fairlines, 100% of us slightly up to our neck in boat debt, 50% of the boats will have problems and 10% won't make it round.
Add to this near-unlimited beer from the Becks beer sponsor, lightly orgainsed timed sections thru cabrera where our individually assigned average speeds of between 22.2 and 32.1 knots MUST be maintained despite this area's special status as a National Marine Park (max speed 10 knots, I toldem ,I toldem) and day 1 ends with a national park keeper going bonkers in his dinghy as he tries to wave down a big lot of dieselly boats driven by pissheads planing through his unspoilt paradise.
Days 2-6 should start at 10,30 sharp but seeing as how everyone stayed up till 4:30 and a load of boat probs, it was delayed till nearer 12.
The following year all the people who chopped in their boat with Fairline majorca got invited again. Some others got invited too! Even me, despite the slight issue of a fight in a bar in Portals. Er well alright maybe I see why I wasnae invited to the Rodriguez thingy....
Aget inted Feelin very very poorly at prize giving, and not really feeling much point in attending since our kids chucked the camera with which we were supposed to solve clues into the sea. The head of Fairline Majorca wore womens underwear, so the MBY journo made sure that this v memorable picture was printed in the mags tho I am not sure that when everyone had sobered up they really appreciated it. However, I think the organisers got off fairly lightly to be pictured wearing clothes.
ah well yes the baearic rally, completely different. Otherwise known as the Drinkathon.
Firstly, 90% of the boats are Fairlines, 100% of us slightly up to our neck in boat debt, 50% of the boats will have problems and 10% won't make it round.
Add to this near-unlimited beer from the Becks beer sponsor, lightly orgainsed timed sections thru cabrera where our individually assigned average speeds of between 22.2 and 32.1 knots MUST be maintained despite this area's special status as a National Marine Park (max speed 10 knots, I toldem ,I toldem) and day 1 ends with a national park keeper going bonkers in his dinghy as he tries to wave down a big lot of dieselly boats driven by pissheads planing through his unspoilt paradise.
Days 2-6 should start at 10,30 sharp but seeing as how everyone stayed up till 4:30 and a load of boat probs, it was delayed till nearer 12.
The following year all the people who chopped in their boat with Fairline majorca got invited again. Some others got invited too! Even me, despite the slight issue of a fight in a bar in Portals. Er well alright maybe I see why I wasnae invited to the Rodriguez thingy....
Aget inted Feelin very very poorly at prize giving, and not really feeling much point in attending since our kids chucked the camera with which we were supposed to solve clues into the sea. The head of Fairline Majorca wore womens underwear, so the MBY journo made sure that this v memorable picture was printed in the mags tho I am not sure that when everyone had sobered up they really appreciated it. However, I think the organisers got off fairly lightly to be pictured wearing clothes.
tcm
...
Re: Skipper and the summer of football madness
Hum, it's three in the same season, 1 resigned, 1 sacked, i was part time anywa. V interestin tho.
Skipper no 1. French. Younsigh, nice, bit dour, not a load of fun. V like a french waiter, v methodical. Wahed the boat every day. Washed it again. Woiuld drive the boat. Would not do anyhting cept wash boat and drive it. I tioldim not to wash the boat and cos he's a bit borin, i don't much wantim hanging around us not swimming, not having a larf. So we went to st tropez on our own. This one also the one I went mental with about entire lazy french nation and taxis not turning up on the day of france v senegal. Two dayys later, he resigned.
Skipper number 2 is swedish. We took him on on the wednesday, went to Port grimaud. Never saw him clean the boat. His idea of preparing the boat was to put all the lilghts on, rather than wash boat. We returned after 4 weeks and 2 days before returjning he hired a girlie deckhand to clean the boat. But some parts of boat not cleaned so i ticked him off. he went potty at me, and offeredhis resignation on the spot. I had a charter due three weeks time so backed off and went to watch the footie v brazil, so came back and sacked him. Something is bound to turn up.
skipper no 3 , croatian but fleunt in spanish and english, resident in majorca. We met him on arrival at balearix. He did the same charter with same guests last year with different boat. he made all the right team noises, but actually lived off the boat and expected girlie to do all the work, promising untold riches inthe form of a tip after the 3-weeks charter. Every 3 days the skipper hires dayworkers to clean the boat at the charterers expense, and doesn't do anything cept drive boat. But he was familar with the boat, and did find little probs for agents in Palma to fix, which they did , quite brilliantly. But monster tip for staff doesn't materialise.
Best option for us seems to be to drive the boat yerself and get an ex-chalet-girl to sort things out at half the price of all the do-nothing skippers. For them, it's a doddle. They are well used to total mecahnical disaters, being nice at close quarters, untold hellish foulups, getting foreign types to fix things right this minute please, making food in impossible circumstamnces, and having a little bit of free time to go swimming or play cards with the kids or takem to the shops oor whatever. Also quite nice to have decorative girlie around. Also speaks English, not quasi rubbish english.
Hum, it's three in the same season, 1 resigned, 1 sacked, i was part time anywa. V interestin tho.
Skipper no 1. French. Younsigh, nice, bit dour, not a load of fun. V like a french waiter, v methodical. Wahed the boat every day. Washed it again. Woiuld drive the boat. Would not do anyhting cept wash boat and drive it. I tioldim not to wash the boat and cos he's a bit borin, i don't much wantim hanging around us not swimming, not having a larf. So we went to st tropez on our own. This one also the one I went mental with about entire lazy french nation and taxis not turning up on the day of france v senegal. Two dayys later, he resigned.
Skipper number 2 is swedish. We took him on on the wednesday, went to Port grimaud. Never saw him clean the boat. His idea of preparing the boat was to put all the lilghts on, rather than wash boat. We returned after 4 weeks and 2 days before returjning he hired a girlie deckhand to clean the boat. But some parts of boat not cleaned so i ticked him off. he went potty at me, and offeredhis resignation on the spot. I had a charter due three weeks time so backed off and went to watch the footie v brazil, so came back and sacked him. Something is bound to turn up.
skipper no 3 , croatian but fleunt in spanish and english, resident in majorca. We met him on arrival at balearix. He did the same charter with same guests last year with different boat. he made all the right team noises, but actually lived off the boat and expected girlie to do all the work, promising untold riches inthe form of a tip after the 3-weeks charter. Every 3 days the skipper hires dayworkers to clean the boat at the charterers expense, and doesn't do anything cept drive boat. But he was familar with the boat, and did find little probs for agents in Palma to fix, which they did , quite brilliantly. But monster tip for staff doesn't materialise.
Best option for us seems to be to drive the boat yerself and get an ex-chalet-girl to sort things out at half the price of all the do-nothing skippers. For them, it's a doddle. They are well used to total mecahnical disaters, being nice at close quarters, untold hellish foulups, getting foreign types to fix things right this minute please, making food in impossible circumstamnces, and having a little bit of free time to go swimming or play cards with the kids or takem to the shops oor whatever. Also quite nice to have decorative girlie around. Also speaks English, not quasi rubbish english.
ccscott49
Well-Known Member
Re: Skipper and the summer of football madness
Nice girl she is aswell! Much prettier than my crew!
Nice girl she is aswell! Much prettier than my crew!