Recently ...

[ParaHandy]

... whilst on a magnificent cruise of the western isles, the vessel's facilities failed to operate. This item of the sailing vessel Claymore's inventory has oft been remarked upon as being a magnificent example of the venerable Thomas Crapper's art.

If you were the captain of this fine boat, would you then:

fling the only bucket overboard?

 

[forestay]

This is the first post of yours that I've read and understood. What language were you using in all your other posts?

 

[jhr]

I think I probably would chuck it overboard. Faced with a khazi-free zone, there is at least a sporting chance that one of the crew (perhaps somebody with valuable previous toilet-sorting expertise) might decide to effect a repair, thus (a) bringing relief to the massed bladders of the Melfort Menopausal Males Association and (b) getting the loo fixed for free (replacement buckets are cheap, and widely available).

It's what Management Consultants call a "win-win" situation, I believe.

 

[ParaHandy]

Re: Port-a-loo

... would such (perhaps brought along by SeaStart/RNLI/Oban CG) not be an alternative omitted from your otherwise comprehensive guide to the provision and repair of emergency facilities. Styled perhaps like one of those premises in Paris which play "mood" music once inside ...

 

[Lakesailor]

Reung-Ho

Is this in fact a post questioning the state of mind or dexterity of the skipper?

 

[Evadne]

Perhaps

..he has never got the hang of the "Bucket and Chuck it" system, i.e. the not letting go of the handle bit, and he didn't realise it was his last bucket.

 

[ParaHandy]

Re: Flush the magic toilet ...

(To the tune of Puff the Magic Dragon)

Flush the magic toilet, lived by the st’bord side,
And frolicked in the autumn mists from Lancs to Kilbride
Flush the magic toilet filled up the sea
Polluting northern beaches for the likes of you and me

Little Suzie Snodgrass loved that rascal loo
And Flush he did love Suzie with a love so rare and true
His pipes were made of silver; his bowl was just the same
And water came cascading down when you pulled his little chain.

He cleaned himself with Harpic, with Brobat and with spit
So that he was nice and clean when Suzie came to sit
Little Suzie Snodgrass used flush everyday,
She’d sit for hours and hours just to pass the time away.

No one else could use him, for he would make them blush
For when they’d finished what they’d done, he would refuse to flush
He’d wait for hours and hours till Suzie next did come
And you should see his pipeworks sing at the touch of Suzie’s bum.

Then one day it happened Suzie came no more
They traded him for a bucket with a heated rim and more
When he was quite certain, this was his final day
He overdosed on Harpic and flushed himself away.

 

[fireball]

Re: Flush the magic toilet ...

/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif - Excellent - you should burn a CD and get it on the Radio!!