Non Boaty Birds!

[Will_M]

Well folks, I am sure i'll get some great advice on this one!!!

The recent new SWMBO is not a boaty bird!! So far its all been fine disappearing every Sunday to go racing, however I feel SWMBO is becoming less considerate towards my chosen pass time!

I have offered her to come along to see what its all about, but so far thats not done the trick.

Q= How do you get them interested?

Please help before SWMBO becomes SWMBOCSWKMAO (CauseSheWillKickMyArseOtherwise)

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[ecudc]

Why not start her on something a little less intense than racing. Try

(1) Persuading a friend with a nice big comfy yacht to take you out for a weekend jaunt to somewhere pretty.
(2) Take her to the boat show at Exel. Show her round loads of boats of all shapes and sizes and the clothes stalls as well. At best she'll realise that sailing doesn't necessarily involve camping and a chemical toilet. At worst she'll be signing you up for a Moody 64.
(3) Taster sails on the old Americas cup boats looked quite fun at Southampton this year.
(4) A villa flotilla holiday for two weeks somewhere nice and hot. She could do the intro to yachting course and meet many yachting virgins as well.

Once you’ve got her enthusiastic about being in the boat then you can start the whole racing idea.



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[sailbadthesinner]

why lavish all that time and money on a recent new swmbo?
give it to her hard and hard
take her out on a wet weekend in November
if she loves it your sorted
if she is still griping ditch the bint and move on

if you really like the girl you could always try the wooing approach, but be warned. take them to the med the first time and that is their idea of sailing for life. they will whine like drain if you then take her to north wales and she jumps off the back of the boat when at anchor, forgetting Menai is nowhere near Med temperatures.
so in the end she will only go sailing if you will guarantee sunshine, which rules out uk cruising hols and means you can do fewer of them.

and she will STILL whinge when you want to go racing on saturday

... or that is what i heard can happen

<hr width=100% size=1><font color=red>if guinness is good for you. i must be very very good</font color=red>

 

[chriscallender]

Bad news I'm afraid. My experience is that it can't be done... maybe others have a different experience which I'd be interested to hear about but here's what I think....

Either she wants to do it or she doesn't. If she wants to do it then there is plenty that can be done to make the experience more pleasant/comfortable and maybe racing in November isn't for everyone, even the enthusiasts amongst us.

But if its not something that she is ever really that bothered about doing and you've taken her out in the boat a few times, and even the best of days when everything went well have only been an "OK" experience then you might as well accept that she's a landlubber...

In my case SWMBO misses all the things like TV, DVDs, microwaves, central heating, comfortable beds, a kitchen with real taps, 4 burners on the cooker, washing machines, cars, and whatever that are available on dry land (or to very rich boat owners only!!!) She doesn't really see what I see when I go out there. Thats just the way it is. Once I even put a huge bar of chocolate on the boat and when that didn't induce her to go out I knew she was a confirmed landlubber.

I've reached a stage where I just accept that we are different ... Nowadays, I go sailing with my mates, have a good time and drink lots of beer... not a bad life ... as long as I remember to switch off my mobile to avoid the arse kickings!!!


Chris

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[temptress]

In my experiance there are only two options:

option 1 : Give up sailing
option 2 : Give up the lady

I believe there is no other way.

<hr width=100% size=1>Temptress of Down
Southsea Marina
Hants
UK

 

[whisper]

Spot on !! In my case I am delighted that SWMBO doesn't like any form of boating. Escape - aahh what bliss !!

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[BrendanS]

tcm has a theory on this, and it is that

option 3) you become a proper stinkie with carpets, large cabins, big beds, dvd/plasma screen, air conditioning ..... and zip around from harbour to harbour giving her plenty of time to go shopping and dress up before going out in the evening.

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[Peppermint]

Re: It\'s the nature of the beast

Your on the hook so the female of the species will be looking to do a little attitude adjustment on you. It's just about control realy ad they can't help it.

In 1975 I got wed and in 1976 I started a bit of light cruising under sail. The current Mrs. Peppermint didn't much like the cold, wet, discomfort stuff that was cruising in the 70's so I gave up sailing. Since giving up I've owned 9 boats, had a successful racing career, cruised the waters between Norway and Ireland, logged about 85k of miles and done a bit of charter skippering.

The secret is that what sailing I was forced to undertake my circumstances beyond my control didn't eat into my domestic engineering time. Gardens get done, shelves are put up and school concerts are attended. I have to admit I don't go to work as much as the average guy but hey something had to give and it might as well be work.

Little did I know when I developed my "give it up but keep doing it" stratergy that it would become the basis for most large corporations and the government to operate under.

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[LadyInBed]

Give her a concession - let her do the garden and decorating while you are away sailing.

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[janeK]

I don't believe you lot .....why not think that maybe there are some differences between the sexes and maybe sailing in anything colder than 20deg C as far as women are concerned isn't all it's cracked up to be.... but lads be assured that's my idea of fun, being wet and cold and thinking what am I doing here in this weather and admit it - you have probably felt the same at times as well.
I would love to sail in warm sunshine without the permanently worn foulies but then I hate shopping, but then I can't talk for hours about various electronic gadgets and gizmo's or down 8+ pints a night either
Talking of which what about when you get into a chandlers hours are spent perusing. You have your toys we have ours (credit cards are high on the list)

If you would like to introduce her to sailing what about going down to Falmouth and spend a few days sailing/cruising (forget the racing bit) around it's a beautiful, sheltered and gentle intro to sailing and a lot warmer than other areas of the UK dependent on the time of year you want to go. I agree with not taking her to the Med as an intro as us girls would nag you all to death about going there again.

if all fails just accept that not couple wants to do the same as each other all the time..... would you want to spend hours washing, cleaning ands doing the garden in your absense. So if you have a busy racing schedule fine but make sure you make it up to her on non-racing weekends/days.

After all at the end of the day her non sailing side isn't what made her attractive to you in the first place........... just accept the differences and make adjustments accordingly

<hr width=100% size=1>JaneK

 

[StellaGirl]

They say opposites attract but I cannot imagine being with someone that doesnt share my love of sailing and appreciate that if I decide to bugger off for a few days on a boat then they cant stop me. Or indeed they wouldnt want stop me as they would do the same.

My better half and I seem to have it sussed. For example I am off on the ARC - hes off to Kings Cup -then we meet up in Sydney - hes off on Sydney-Hobart and I will meet him at finish. I cant think that a non-boaty bloke would allow me to sail half way round the world with a boat full of men - so I count myself lucky.

Anyway - I am a great believer in if its meant to be - it will be. Dont make huge changes to please someone else. But appreciate that there is always going to be some give and take. If your new SWMBO new you sailed when you met her then she has to accept that.

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[Will_M]

Option 2....

Thanks temptress!!!!!!!!!

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[beancounter]

ref your point 4 - done that. The Memsahib is now more than ever convinced that sailyboatythingies should be thermostatically controlled - not able to leave port if the temperature is <21C.

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[DeeGee]

There IS another way!!

It is quite simple, really. It relies on understanding women.

Sort out with a friend, the loan of their really smashing wife. A female colleague at work will also do, but is rather a dangerous ingredient.

Take said bird out sailing, and invite home for post-sailing debriefing/drinkies...Essential that said bird also mad about sailng, especially if not been sailing before.

This will either a) cause wife to adjust her point of view, or b) cause divorce, in which case you pick up with bird who loves it ( and sailing). )

<hr width=100% size=1>Black Sugar - the sweetest of all

 

[Eudorajab]

Basically if they are not then you aint gonna ever change them. My advice ... trade her in for a boaty model

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