abraxus
New member
After much consultation the government has decided to introduce an outright ban on sex after it was discovered and categorically proven that sex could in some cases lead to birth.
Further study has shown that alarmingly birth has a 100% mortality rate.
A government spokesman has stated that how can they allow this carnange to continue when it's now a proven fact that everyone who is born will die.
As well as the unprecedented death rate, there are also the incidental risks along the way that some of those born may suffer needlessly. These include, being the victim of crime, being abused, suffering a virtually unlimited range of other illnesses and diseases and countless other potential tragedies.
Apart from the suffering the above may cause they also put an unneccesary burden on health and other public resources.
The government has spent billions on researching all alternatives, and a think tank in Brussels has concluded that the only way to stop death and suffering with 100% efficiency is to attack it at source and prevent birth.
New labour spokesman for the ban on sex has annonced that self gratification is the way forward for a death free world and is presently applying for a tax increase to allow the state provision of pornographic magazines to assist in it's national education programme. He states, that: "we as a government are a committed bunch of w*nk*rs and will encourage you to become w*nk*rs as well.
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Further study has shown that alarmingly birth has a 100% mortality rate.
A government spokesman has stated that how can they allow this carnange to continue when it's now a proven fact that everyone who is born will die.
As well as the unprecedented death rate, there are also the incidental risks along the way that some of those born may suffer needlessly. These include, being the victim of crime, being abused, suffering a virtually unlimited range of other illnesses and diseases and countless other potential tragedies.
Apart from the suffering the above may cause they also put an unneccesary burden on health and other public resources.
The government has spent billions on researching all alternatives, and a think tank in Brussels has concluded that the only way to stop death and suffering with 100% efficiency is to attack it at source and prevent birth.
New labour spokesman for the ban on sex has annonced that self gratification is the way forward for a death free world and is presently applying for a tax increase to allow the state provision of pornographic magazines to assist in it's national education programme. He states, that: "we as a government are a committed bunch of w*nk*rs and will encourage you to become w*nk*rs as well.
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