New heating plant in NW Scotland approved ....

[ParaHandy]

After a long and lengthy fight with the Lorne & Bute Council planners, a spokesperson for C Laymore & Co Ltd announced that the plan to moor a floating power plant on the Loch Melfort foreshore had finally been approved.

The spokesperson went on to say that the plant which was purchased some years ago from the manufacturers, LBS Guinness Bar Ltd, had been stored at the AuldGrumpyGit Yard, Loch Melfort, and was a testament to the foresight, vision and innovation of the CEO of Laymore Ltd. The company had for many years been a manufacturer of advanced chicken feed marketed under the brand “Lay-more Pellets” which led the company to investigate a use for the effluent output of the many chickens fed from Lay-more Pellets. This easily combustible by-product of their superb feed was found to be an efficient fuel with remarkably high calorific value.

A spokesperson for the RYA praised the company and said that “this collaboration with the RYA is warmly welcomed”.

One of the principal objectors, Mrs D Heart, claimed today to having not been consulted and that a number of her specific objections had yet to be met and went on to accuse the Lorne & Bute Council of being “in the pay of an undoubted rapscallion who had the council in his pocket”. She also noted how many of the technical aspects had yet to be decided such as the position of the chimney and control of the unacceptable odours which, she said, “would be worse than (his) flatulence after a bevy and curry”. The Council noted an unusually large number of objectors from the south of England who mostly casted doubt on whether it could ever be made to work and many pointed out that the last such attempt ended in disaster when it blew rather than sucked.

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[Magic]

Sounds like a load of chicken chit to me, but maybe I am just being fowl.

As long as these rumors don't become an pandemic I can't see a problem, but I am sure a wise owl will correct me.

 

[ChrisE]

You'll have been on the sherry again then, Douglas?

 

[ParaHandy]

Sherry .. ? I'll raise a glass of Sanatogen (the auld goat's favoured tipple) to his success ...

 

[ChrisE]

Hmmm, mulled Sanatogen, the choice drink for these colder months.

 

[summerwind]

I've always known that Scotland was powered by bull s*it.

Now we are seeing diversification.

I wonder how much the English are going to have to pay for this advancement.

 

[catmandoo]

Unfortunately for you one of my friends built a similar plant aout 10 yeas ago in the south of England -Ran on Chickenshit from local farmers . As I recall it was fermented to produce methane and then powered a gas turbine generator

 

[summerwind]

Nothing unfortunate about it at all. Thanks for your concern. In fact, I was marginally involved in the planning stages of one of these plants and quite profitable it is too. The power is sold into the National Grid - very Green!

That really wasn't my point though, was it? The guys down here who constructed the plant received not a penny of outside funding, especially not from Scotland, who seem to be the public funding drain of Britain.

Of course, I should not underestimate the contribution Scotland makes to the output of moaning, groaning, complaining and general miserable attitude that makes up such an important part of Britain's contribution to world affairs.

Of course, I suppose if I lived in a climate where when it isn't freezing cold and lashing down with rain, the place is plagued with biting insects, I would be a miserable sod too. /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif

 

[catmandoo]

I believe the contribution of Scotland to Britains coffers was much more than publically stated The contribution of Northsea oil for example ?

Also for a small country of less than 5 million its contribution to Western Civilisation was immense .

I for one dont care what you think .

I know