Nautical Wisdom...

[beancounter]

...found in an old copy of YM, with a few additions

When antifouling, you'll need two ounces more than there is in the tin

The depth of your bilge equals the full stretch of your arm, plus one inch

In every repair, a little blood must flow

Stainless steel isn't

Charter yachts sleep two less than advertised

The part most likely to break will be either the most inaccessible, the most expensive, or both.

The wind is free - it's the sails that cost a fortune

Jiffy-reefing isn't

Never buy the Mk1 version of anything

Always remember that a shipping forecast is just a horoscope with numbers

In a navigational calculation, the figure that is most obviously correct will be the source of any error

Tolerances accumulate unidirectionally towards maximum difficulty of assembly

When any repaired item is reassembled, there will always be a small piece left on the deck

Interchangeable parts aren't


Any more???

 

[MoodySabre]

Five minute jobs take half an hour

 

[FullCircle]

The amount of Sikaflex needed to finish the job is in the tube that you have just discovered has gone off.

A spinnaker wrap around the forestay is never done without a crowd of onlookers.

That essential repair offshore needs a countersunk M5x50mm. Despite having 4kg of spare screws the nearest you have is an M5x40mm Pan head.

Electronics prices drop 50% the week after you have bought them.

A floating keyring will never be recovered, it is the modern equivalent of a message in a bottle to someone somewhere.

Winch handles ability to fly are in direct proportion to their original cost.

The masthead lightbulb is 5 times more unreliable than any of the ones you can get at.

Crew are only available at their convenience.

The heads will block only when ladies are aboard, and in urgent need.

That drip of condensation will always land on the 2 square inches of your face showing out of the sleeping bag.

 

[eastcoastbernie]

While attempting to fix a 20p job you will break or lose something that costs £100 to repair or replace.

If you go well to windward of a leeward obstacle in a strong breeze, the wind will die and you'll hit something on the windward side.

No matter how carefully you coil and stow them, halyard ends always tie themselves in knots.

The list of jobs to do never gets any shorter.

No-one is ever around with a camera when the sun is shining and the boat is going like the clappers.

 

[simplesimon]

Don't try to spit into the wind /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif

Its guaranteed that when trying to make tea or coffee when heeled that you will always end up with more in the bilge or over your hands than in your cup.

never ever leave the oil filler cap on the rocker box cover when topping up the oil it as its will almost certainly disappear into another dimension leaving you with a major headache

if you say the words there should be enough water for us then expect to be wrong from time to time


Simon