Colin24
New member
The following will only make any sense (at best) to readers of a certain age. Apologies to the rest.
A chap goes into a seafood restaurant, a gourmet establishment, of the sort that has all kinds of different types of ‘live‘ seafood in tanks, so that you can pick your own meal. Gervais the headwaiter shows him to the tanks.
Perusing the various specimens on offer the chap decided he’d like some squid. Peering into the tank containing an assortment of squid he spies an unusually large example with a strange green hue to its skin, sitting motionless in the corner of the tank.
Never having seen a squid like it, he asked the waiter what it was called. ‘Ah yes, most unusual sir’ said Gervais, ‘It’s a Hairy-Lipped Squid, It never moves from that spot, just sits there all calm and docile.’
‘Well, not anymore’ says the customer, ‘that’s the one I’m ordering for the plate’
‘No no sir’ said Gervais, ‘you don’t understand, he’s a sort of restaurant mascot, he’s in the tank to add colour and interest to the display –we are all very fond of him, you must choose again'. Don’t be ridicules, this is a seafood restaurant', said the customer 'there’s no place for sentiment here, I demand that he is dispatched and cooked at once’!
The waiter knew he could not find it in his heart to harm the green squid. Then he had an idea, what about Hans the kitchen porter who does the dishes, He’s a tough guy surly he’d have no qualms about slaughtering poor old hairy lips.
Hans was summonsed and given the instructions –‘No problem’ he said.
The green squid did not flinch even as Hans lifted him from the tank and placed him on the chopping board, so trusting had he become of the restaurant staff.
Then, with the clever raised and ready to drop, Hans suddenly placed the clever on the table and has body shook as he began sobbing uncontrollably, ‘I can’t do it’ He sobbed. And never did.
And the moral of the story…
Wait for it…
Hans that does dishes can be soft as Gervais with mild green hairy lipped squid.
I'll get my coat...
<hr width=100% size=1>No boat.<P ID="edit"><FONT SIZE=-1>Edited by Colin24 on 12/03/2004 04:33 (server time).</FONT></P>
A chap goes into a seafood restaurant, a gourmet establishment, of the sort that has all kinds of different types of ‘live‘ seafood in tanks, so that you can pick your own meal. Gervais the headwaiter shows him to the tanks.
Perusing the various specimens on offer the chap decided he’d like some squid. Peering into the tank containing an assortment of squid he spies an unusually large example with a strange green hue to its skin, sitting motionless in the corner of the tank.
Never having seen a squid like it, he asked the waiter what it was called. ‘Ah yes, most unusual sir’ said Gervais, ‘It’s a Hairy-Lipped Squid, It never moves from that spot, just sits there all calm and docile.’
‘Well, not anymore’ says the customer, ‘that’s the one I’m ordering for the plate’
‘No no sir’ said Gervais, ‘you don’t understand, he’s a sort of restaurant mascot, he’s in the tank to add colour and interest to the display –we are all very fond of him, you must choose again'. Don’t be ridicules, this is a seafood restaurant', said the customer 'there’s no place for sentiment here, I demand that he is dispatched and cooked at once’!
The waiter knew he could not find it in his heart to harm the green squid. Then he had an idea, what about Hans the kitchen porter who does the dishes, He’s a tough guy surly he’d have no qualms about slaughtering poor old hairy lips.
Hans was summonsed and given the instructions –‘No problem’ he said.
The green squid did not flinch even as Hans lifted him from the tank and placed him on the chopping board, so trusting had he become of the restaurant staff.
Then, with the clever raised and ready to drop, Hans suddenly placed the clever on the table and has body shook as he began sobbing uncontrollably, ‘I can’t do it’ He sobbed. And never did.
And the moral of the story…
Wait for it…
Hans that does dishes can be soft as Gervais with mild green hairy lipped squid.
I'll get my coat...
<hr width=100% size=1>No boat.<P ID="edit"><FONT SIZE=-1>Edited by Colin24 on 12/03/2004 04:33 (server time).</FONT></P>
