Lunchmoneygate : coverup required

[tcm]

Um, it's widely reproted that ellen "saved up her lunch money" to buy her first boat. I fear that the national press are bound to investigate further in their usual horrible nasty manner, and it does seem a little far-fetched that whilst an active person she managed to go without lunch for long enough to buy a boat. Of course, it may be that she had enough money for lunch at Claridges every day, but unlikly, and school dinners don't cost too much really. I do thik a plausible story needs to be worked up post haste to avoid any pre-palace embarasment. How much did her first boat cost (ish) and how much does school dinner cost?

 

[tome]

It's true, why do you think she's only 5ft 2in?

 

[Salty]

My lass trotted off to school this morning with £1.37 in her pocket for lunch. At that rate she'll be 400 years old before she can buy me the Swan 45 I fancy, and it'll better have electric winches as she'll be a bit on the thin side for grinding the manual ones.

 

[Peppermint]

Re: What kind of roll model is that.

Disregarding parents wishes. Ignoring government guidelines on nutrition and it's effect on education. No wonder the younger generation are in a state.

I used to spend mine, five shillings as I remember it, on Number 6's and chips.

I do remember her and her boat, a little Corribee, taking up residence in the pool at LIBS back in Earls Court days.

 

[jhr]

Extract from Ellen\'s log

Monday: I'm not sure how long I can carry on with the sheer agony of hunger. Managed to get through double Latin this morning, but "Gaul is divided into three parts" made me think of carving up a pizza, and I was close to tears - a very emotional moment. After break - a mug of water (God, I hate the stuff!) and a sniff of Rachel's Twix Bar - we had Geography. I can't see the point of learning about the weather, can you?

At lunchtime, it all got too much, so I went out to the Playground and dissolved into tears. Luckily a nice person from the DIY store down the road saw how distressed I was, and offered me a free lunch. Hmm; I must remember that..............

 

[Rowana]

Re: What kind of roll model is that.

Ah, Number 6 !

We used to call them "Football pool fags" - 8 draws and they were finished !

 

[Salty]

Re: What kind of roll model is that.

Ellen simply wasn't entrepreneurial enough. As the tallest in the class I got the job of buying the fags, booze and porn mags for everyone else, for which I charged a healthy commission. Unfortunately rather than saving it for a dinghy, I spent it all on fags, booze and porn mags.

 

[DepSol]

Maybe she perfected her threatening miserable look on kids at school to get their lunch money off them and thats how she got her first boat so quick.

 

[Peppermint]

Re: Now this is more like it.

Us brits are famous for not taking our hero's too seriously. We like to take the piss. I just can't get into hero worship. It's not the way I was dragged up at all.

My school dinners could have been used to make a boat at least as tough as B&Q. I had a mate broke a tooth on the gravy.

 

[tcm]

The price of fame : Nelson/Hardy

well, it's only beacuse the endurance sailing is now more like a reality tv program that of course this minutiae will all be crawled over in fine detail. I wd've been fine if they did it old-style with a note 3 weeks later saying btw, we've bashed the french and spanish or whatever.

BUT continuing with the nelson thing, nobody investigated why a warship has spare flipping entire barrel of brandy on board for pitting spare bodies in. Hm? Or at least, if it WAS the done thing to have spare barrel for officer-preservation purposes, nobody said oi - what happened to all the displaced brandy hm? There must've been a fair bit. In fact this would mnean Hardy had a very good motive for doing in Nelson - knowing that otherwise he (hardy) might get done by his own men being fatter/bigger than nelson and hence displacing lots more of the free brandy. This of course explains the "kiss me hardy" comment with hardy most likely having a mouthful of rejuvenating brandy most of the time. Or alternatively, they had bundled Nelson into the brandy barrel a bit early, and he was asking for a mouthful of air.

Meanwhile, i note that corribee's are only 3 grand, and her aunt gave her some money, so she should hopefully be in the clear, although it's a shame that "Auntie" did n't get her own logo space on the boat.

Meanwhile Hardy should be dug up and checked over.

 

[Mirelle]

Brilliant.

Just right. Are you sure you don't do this for a living?

 

[oldgit]

ReThat Hardy bloke.

As with every important boaty event the Medway is involved.The Victory was built here not at that poncy portsmouth place and whats more Hardy is buried right along side the Medway at Burham Church.That Raleigh bloke did time round here as well
Ps Have I mentioned that the Medw................

 

[jhr]

Re: Brilliant.

[ QUOTE ]
Are you sure you don't do this for a living?

[/ QUOTE ]

I wish I did, particularly at times like the present when, as an HR type, I am overseeing a "restructure".

But you have to laugh, or else you'd cry................

 

[Parsonsheath]

Re: The price of fame : Nelson/Hardy

If you read the press today you will see the first boat was a dinghy, and the Corribbee came when she was getting on in life, nearly 17, and that cost £1,370, but don't tell the taxman or he will want to know what she sold it for and come down on her like a ton of bricks for the C.G.T!

Strange, isn't it, how the child can fix on the one idea, even more rare for that to become the bloody minded determination that has driven this young lady so far, and so fast at such a tender age.

 

[Forbsie]

One presenter on the Beeb yesterday referred to her saving up her 'Thrupennies'!! /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif

Considering she must have been born around 1977, maybe she was trying to corner the market in these coins and flogged them through Christie's to buy Mirabella I, but didn't quite make it. /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[Bejasus]

are you sure he didn#t mean she was saving up for her 'thrupennies' which she still hasn't managed to get.

 

[marina95]

[ QUOTE ]
One presenter on the Beeb yesterday referred to her saving up her 'Thrupennies'!! /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Don't you know nuffink?

Thrupenny Bits - "Tits"...

A vague reference to exp(e/a)nsive cosmetic surgery methinks...