Little things that get up your nose

Twister_Ken · 23 Oct 2004

No, you're not spozed to take the title seriously. I mean bits of everyday crassosity that twist your knickers.

One that gets me is the American way of calling anyone that runs a lee-shure boat "Captain".

Another is the gen pub assumption that anyone who owns any sort of boat bigger than a lilo is rolling in it.

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Ohdrat · 23 Oct 2004

boggies... and facetious replies

PaulJ · 23 Oct 2004

Ummm..... People who don't bother to reply when you take the trouble to write to them with what you hope might be useful information...

<hr width=100% size=1>I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.....

Peppermint · 23 Oct 2004

Re: Just about everything

Americans using the word Captain passes me by as they've usually infuriated me just by existing.

Some of the many things that piss me right off are...

people moaning about stuff like "middle lane hogs" or "farm smells in the country" or "aircraft noise near an airfield". The people who listen to or broadcast these moaners get on my wick to.

People who are right get right up my nose.

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Twister_Ken · 23 Oct 2004

I\'m offensive

Forgot to reply to a helpful pm from PaulJ. Mea culpa. Ten thousand apologies.

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ParaHandy · 23 Oct 2004

Accenture plc ... whose then head of business IT consultancy, Mr Ian Watmore, fitted Sainsbury up with a fancy IT system that didn't work (contributing to Sainsbury making a loss for the first time, ever). But Mr Watmore has moved on, unscathed, from this experience and has been appointed head of the e-Government Unit in Whitehall where he will oversee plenty of other disasters eg NHS IT project ("cost" £6bn - actual £18bn and climbing) ........ ho, hum ... suppose set a thief to catch one?

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Guest · 23 Oct 2004

Cheque Book boating and US spelling

Yep - Cheque book boating really gets my 'goat' .... why ? Because it reduces the sources of genuine items and also the spirit of sailing ....

Second the PC with dear ol Bill Gates must answer along with TV the americanisation of the English language.

Type in Colour to average PC and bang you get a red line under it ...... sod off yanks - WE PUT THE ENGLISH language together along with the Vikings etc. - not you lot !! I get fed up with having to <add> to spelling dictionarys the ENGLISH style / spelling instead of the lazy yank style ..... So you say - install British Dictionary etc ..... IT STILL HAPPENS ok to a lesser degree - but many programs do not recognise the UK speelings ..... even after installing Brit Dict.

Bill Gates - you have a lot to answer for !!!! Buggy windows versions launched before sorting, Office that corrupts registrys / integrates into windows so tight that a rabbits dick can't get in ...., IE 6 SP1 etc. crashing / refusing downloads etc. etc. etc.

Why did I read this post ........ it cannot be boredom again can it ????

<hr width=100% size=1>Cheers Nigel http://groups.yahoo.com/group/gps-navigator/ http://groups.yahoo.com/group/searider/

PaulJ · 23 Oct 2004

Re: I\'m offensive

No problem.... but you did ask!!! ;o)

<hr width=100% size=1>I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.....

powerskipper · 23 Oct 2004

Heres a way to feel better

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://powerskipper.mysite.freeserve.com/>http://powerskipper.mysite.freeserve.com/</A>
Julie

powerskipper · 23 Oct 2004

FOUND THIS AND THOUGHT IT WAS QUITE GOOD.

Let's face it -- English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preacher praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue?

Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and wise guy are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another.

Have you noticed that we talk about certain things only when they are absent? Have you ever seen a horseful carriage or a strapful gown? Met a sung hero or experienced requited love? Have you ever run into someone who was combobulated, gruntled, ruly or peccable? And where are all those people who ARE spring chickens or who would ACTUALLY hurt a fly?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm clock goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all). That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it.

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://powerskipper.mysite.freeserve.com/>http://powerskipper.mysite.freeserve.com/</A>
Julie

Magic_Sailor · 23 Oct 2004

The young's way of saying "I done it" as opposed to "I did it".

A complete disregard for correct spelling and punctuation brought about by SMS. (NOTE: not perfection)

The current tendency for people to almost never call you back - even when they've undertaken to - let alone when you leave a message on their answerphone.

Words that mean nothing like "mingin'" or "bling"

The ability of corporate or institutional representatives to say that black is white.

eeermm - now you've got me started Ken. I'm of for a pint of the tincture of laudenam with my mate Stephen Maturin.

Magic

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://practical-business.co.uk>Click for website!</A>

Peppermint · 23 Oct 2004

Re: AND!!!!

people ringing me up with their stupid sales pitches. Indians selling double glazing and fitted kitchens that they don't have.

Damn me if I don't get bloody robots ringing me up saying I've won a prize and the real killer, the nobodies there call, when the phone rings and it's just silence. GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!

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sailorman · 23 Oct 2004

Re: Just about everything

we in England used to have Shops, now stoores ! W H Y Mr Booshe

I hate Fablon!!!!
Im a teak only type

<hr width=100% size=1><P ID="edit"><FONT SIZE=-1>Edited by sailorman on 23/10/2004 19:47 (server time).</FONT></P>

ShipsWoofy · 23 Oct 2004

Oooh ok, I will alienate myself a little more on this forum.

People who write here here instead of hear hear

People who regularly write your instead of you're

there instead of they're or their where appropriate.

People who write 100 lines in a single paragraph or don't punctuate, not expecting perfect English, but I get very tired of trying to read something that you have to go over a few times to make sense.

Not bothered about spelling, especially online as most tend to be key slips.

People like me who winge about other peoples writing skills, that really gets up my nose/forums/images/icons/smile.gif

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.topcatsail.co.uk>Woof</A>

ShipsWoofy · 23 Oct 2004

Every landscape now that seems to have a MacDonalds sign in clear view. I remember on my last trip to the USA in 1993, being horrified looking over the city at all the MacD's Kentucky's etc blazing away in the night sky. We have it here now, and I hate it. I wish people would fight it, only yank restaurants (ha ha) have petrol station type signs.

At least British food eateries have knives and forks!

<hr width=100% size=1><A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.topcatsail.co.uk>Woof</A>

Twister_Ken · 23 Oct 2004

People that spell whinge winge?

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powerskipper · 23 Oct 2004

people who don't remember you told them something when you did!

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Julie

Twister_Ken · 23 Oct 2004

No, you didn't.

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powerskipper · 23 Oct 2004

Yes I did , 3 weeks ago.
then 2 weeks ago
then last week and again today.
now listen

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Julie

Twister_Ken · 23 Oct 2004

I'm certain you didn't.

Wotsyername again?

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