coliholic
New member
Learner\'s early life?
Not many people know that in his younger days, Learner was a sheep farmer in Wales and for a while was having trouble getting his sheep to breed. He'd tried several different rams and methods but all to no avail.
In desperation he called the vet. The vet had a look and said that the only way to get the ewes pregnant was for him to do the deed himself! The vet also told Learner to look at the sheep in the morning, if they are rolling in the mud they're pregnant, and if they are rolling in the straw they're not.
So the next day Learner put a couple of sheep in the back of the Land-rover and took them away from the farm so his wife didn't see what he's up to. He did the necessary and on returning to the farm went off tired to bed.
In the morning his wife woke him up, "Look you see Learner, them B****y sheep are making a B****y racket, isn't it", she told him. "Are they rolling in the mud or in the straw?", he asked her, "in the straw" she says.
So he got up, loaded as many sheep in the back of the Landy as he could and off he went. When he got back later he was so tired he went straight to bed. In the morning his wife woke him up again, "Them B****y sheep are making a B****y racket again Learner, isn't it", she says. Again he asked her where they are rolling, "In the straw" she replied.
So again he gets up, hitches the trailer to the back and gets all of his sheep in and takes them off. He's gone quite a while as there's a lot to get through, but when he's finally finished he's totally exhausted and again goes straight to bed.
Morning dawns and his wife wakes him up, "Now look you see Learner, them B****y sheep are making a B****y racket again", so once more he asks "are they rolling in the mud or are they rolling in the straw?"
She says, "THERE IN THE F*****G LAND-ROVER PIPPING THE HORN!!!!!"
Not many people know that in his younger days, Learner was a sheep farmer in Wales and for a while was having trouble getting his sheep to breed. He'd tried several different rams and methods but all to no avail.
In desperation he called the vet. The vet had a look and said that the only way to get the ewes pregnant was for him to do the deed himself! The vet also told Learner to look at the sheep in the morning, if they are rolling in the mud they're pregnant, and if they are rolling in the straw they're not.
So the next day Learner put a couple of sheep in the back of the Land-rover and took them away from the farm so his wife didn't see what he's up to. He did the necessary and on returning to the farm went off tired to bed.
In the morning his wife woke him up, "Look you see Learner, them B****y sheep are making a B****y racket, isn't it", she told him. "Are they rolling in the mud or in the straw?", he asked her, "in the straw" she says.
So he got up, loaded as many sheep in the back of the Landy as he could and off he went. When he got back later he was so tired he went straight to bed. In the morning his wife woke him up again, "Them B****y sheep are making a B****y racket again Learner, isn't it", she says. Again he asked her where they are rolling, "In the straw" she replied.
So again he gets up, hitches the trailer to the back and gets all of his sheep in and takes them off. He's gone quite a while as there's a lot to get through, but when he's finally finished he's totally exhausted and again goes straight to bed.
Morning dawns and his wife wakes him up, "Now look you see Learner, them B****y sheep are making a B****y racket again", so once more he asks "are they rolling in the mud or are they rolling in the straw?"
She says, "THERE IN THE F*****G LAND-ROVER PIPPING THE HORN!!!!!"
