orion21
New member
Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.
Lady 1: What's that?
Lady 2: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Lady 1: Where did you get it?
Lady 2: You can get them at any chemist.
The next day, Lady 1 hobbles herself into the
local chemist and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.
The guy, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age)
The guy very delicately asks what brand she prefers.
"Doesn't matter son, as long as it fits a Camel."
The pharmacist fainted.
This bloke walked into the doctors and said "I think im ill, but i dont know what it is". The doctor checks him over and discovers he's got lots of 10 pound notes stuck into his back, after extracting all the notes the doctor counts the money and there is £1990 alltogether, the bloke looks at the money, shakes his head and says "I knew i wasnt feeling too grand"
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Lady 1: What's that?
Lady 2: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Lady 1: Where did you get it?
Lady 2: You can get them at any chemist.
The next day, Lady 1 hobbles herself into the
local chemist and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.
The guy, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age)
The guy very delicately asks what brand she prefers.
"Doesn't matter son, as long as it fits a Camel."
The pharmacist fainted.
This bloke walked into the doctors and said "I think im ill, but i dont know what it is". The doctor checks him over and discovers he's got lots of 10 pound notes stuck into his back, after extracting all the notes the doctor counts the money and there is £1990 alltogether, the bloke looks at the money, shakes his head and says "I knew i wasnt feeling too grand"
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