hlb
RIP
Jaws 3.5 , Women, Volvo\'s And Colin !!
Back from the deep Colin. Six bloody hours from Plymouth.
Well!! Some body's redecorated the club room whilst I've been
away. Not many visitor's though.
Part One The Fishing Trip.
The story so far.
Pop groups fishing trip to Plymouth.
Get there and the mechanic still has'nt finished fitting the fish finder. Get him back late at night but no luck it cant see through the hull, which it's supposed to do.
So out 12 miles the next day to Hands Deep.
No fish and one fisher man's sick as a dog.
Requested to head for land so head for Fowey.
Fowey entrance " What we doing here we're supposed to be fishing" !!
Back out a mile or two and catch one or two mackerel. There a bit sick cos I catch a couple of Pollock off the fly bridge.
Loads of complaints about lack of fish but otherwise we're
having a great time cept they cant find a pub with Lancashire type beer in it!!
Out of Fowey next morning and head towards Megavesey.
I find them the biggest fish they've ever seen. Twenty odd
feet long and touching the boat. Loads of them.
"Well catch the bloody things" I yell. "What the F*** with" comes the reply. "Stick a mackerel on the anchor"
Fishermen drop the rods and come back with cameras.
Basking Sharkes. Theres loads in Cornwall,
Trip into Megavisey (However they spell it).
and I'm weening them off fishing slowly and more into a giant
pub crawl round Cornwall and there begining to like it.
Next stop Loe, Anchor in the bay and off to the next pub by dinghy.
Then into Queen Anne Battery and the flesh pots of Plymouth
for the last night.
PART TWO. WOMEN.
Now the plan is fishy men are to take my car back home and
wifey is going to drive it back to Plymouth 300 miles.
Now bare in mind, the last time she did something similar. I sent her to Dewsbery and she rang back from Wolverhampton!!
Eight thirty next morning she's on the phone from just outside Plymouth.
Next day. Set off for Salcolmbe in the fog but we could see about half a mile so no worrys.
Out of the Sound I turns a bit too much east, pushes the auto button and says to the wife. " If you see anything stop " I gose down stairs to start up the radar and sort the sat-nav. The telly's still showing Plymouth harbour so I'm pressing a few buttons and am just about to press a few more when I happen to look through the window screen.
Wall to wall cliffs and rocks!! And the boats doing twenty odd knots.!!
I fumble with the intercom and then think. No she'll just think I'm having a row if I start shouting down it.
So I'm scrambling up the ladder cept I'm going down two steps for every one I go up. Cos of the panic!!
I grab the throttles and the boat stops dead.
" Could you not see the rocks" I croak.
" I've been looking at them for ages but you said the boat was in Auto Pilot" She said. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????? I've learned after thirty years to say nothing.
Eventualy got to Exmouth cos the book says it difficult and not
many go there.
Nice woman on the phone said for eight quid she would open the lock and let us up to Exeter and would be glad to see us cos nobody goes. Cept Exeter Council has a rule that even the navy cant sleep on boats in there town. So nobody goes and neither did we!
Now on the way back to Plymouth just about Torquay a lucky thing happend cos there was a big clattering and banging sound and the last old gearbox finaly blew. What a relief.
I'd been waiting for it to go for two bloody years!!
Still heading for Plymouth but a bit slower now. Thought I'd
see if Brixham coast gards were still speaking just in case something else blew. Nice man said the forcast was all wrong
and the wind was getting up. Well on one engine I've got about the same turning circle to port as the Titanic had but never mind.
Meanwhile the fuel in the port tank is getting lower and lower cos of the one engine. But theres the fuel barge at Salcolmbe.
Ah but its low tide and a rough sea over the bar and no much stearing.
So I asks nice man at the coast guards if he can get Salcolmbe's harbour master to give us a little push into the direction of the Harbour.
No problem its all arranged.
So we gets to the bar and no Harbour boat.
There's loads of folk calling him on the radio and telling him to go there but he's not the proper harbour master just the boat driver and he cant be bothered.
I'm now expecting some prat in a yacht demanding right of way to come flying round the corner. No such luck.
Harbour boats waiting off the town , Luckily gets rid of a few sailing dinghys with kids in, all going up the wall cos they cant have right of way across the river for once!
Harbour boat now takes a turn to port to our mooring buoy.
We carry staight on!!
At this point the guy finally gets to grips with the idea.
That we have'nt called him out just to be a nuisance.
Aha! But the fuel barge is broke down now so theres still no diesel. So wife tells me to play around with pipes and pumps
and things and get the diesel out of the other tank.
We managed to get plenty of diesel over the new carpet. Fitted last week oh and plenty of black marks on the newly washed setee. But only about two gallon in the tank.
Five oclock next day fuel barge is mended so we go over and
rammed it a couple of times just to see if it was as solid as it looked!! It was.
Then a leisurely trip back to plymouth.
Air Tours or Thompsons just dont get the same effect!!
Back from the deep Colin. Six bloody hours from Plymouth.
Well!! Some body's redecorated the club room whilst I've been
away. Not many visitor's though.
Part One The Fishing Trip.
The story so far.
Pop groups fishing trip to Plymouth.
Get there and the mechanic still has'nt finished fitting the fish finder. Get him back late at night but no luck it cant see through the hull, which it's supposed to do.
So out 12 miles the next day to Hands Deep.
No fish and one fisher man's sick as a dog.
Requested to head for land so head for Fowey.
Fowey entrance " What we doing here we're supposed to be fishing" !!
Back out a mile or two and catch one or two mackerel. There a bit sick cos I catch a couple of Pollock off the fly bridge.
Loads of complaints about lack of fish but otherwise we're
having a great time cept they cant find a pub with Lancashire type beer in it!!
Out of Fowey next morning and head towards Megavesey.
I find them the biggest fish they've ever seen. Twenty odd
feet long and touching the boat. Loads of them.
"Well catch the bloody things" I yell. "What the F*** with" comes the reply. "Stick a mackerel on the anchor"
Fishermen drop the rods and come back with cameras.
Basking Sharkes. Theres loads in Cornwall,
Trip into Megavisey (However they spell it).
and I'm weening them off fishing slowly and more into a giant
pub crawl round Cornwall and there begining to like it.
Next stop Loe, Anchor in the bay and off to the next pub by dinghy.
Then into Queen Anne Battery and the flesh pots of Plymouth
for the last night.
PART TWO. WOMEN.
Now the plan is fishy men are to take my car back home and
wifey is going to drive it back to Plymouth 300 miles.
Now bare in mind, the last time she did something similar. I sent her to Dewsbery and she rang back from Wolverhampton!!
Eight thirty next morning she's on the phone from just outside Plymouth.
Next day. Set off for Salcolmbe in the fog but we could see about half a mile so no worrys.
Out of the Sound I turns a bit too much east, pushes the auto button and says to the wife. " If you see anything stop " I gose down stairs to start up the radar and sort the sat-nav. The telly's still showing Plymouth harbour so I'm pressing a few buttons and am just about to press a few more when I happen to look through the window screen.
Wall to wall cliffs and rocks!! And the boats doing twenty odd knots.!!
I fumble with the intercom and then think. No she'll just think I'm having a row if I start shouting down it.
So I'm scrambling up the ladder cept I'm going down two steps for every one I go up. Cos of the panic!!
I grab the throttles and the boat stops dead.
" Could you not see the rocks" I croak.
" I've been looking at them for ages but you said the boat was in Auto Pilot" She said. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????? I've learned after thirty years to say nothing.
Eventualy got to Exmouth cos the book says it difficult and not
many go there.
Nice woman on the phone said for eight quid she would open the lock and let us up to Exeter and would be glad to see us cos nobody goes. Cept Exeter Council has a rule that even the navy cant sleep on boats in there town. So nobody goes and neither did we!
Now on the way back to Plymouth just about Torquay a lucky thing happend cos there was a big clattering and banging sound and the last old gearbox finaly blew. What a relief.
I'd been waiting for it to go for two bloody years!!
Still heading for Plymouth but a bit slower now. Thought I'd
see if Brixham coast gards were still speaking just in case something else blew. Nice man said the forcast was all wrong
and the wind was getting up. Well on one engine I've got about the same turning circle to port as the Titanic had but never mind.
Meanwhile the fuel in the port tank is getting lower and lower cos of the one engine. But theres the fuel barge at Salcolmbe.
Ah but its low tide and a rough sea over the bar and no much stearing.
So I asks nice man at the coast guards if he can get Salcolmbe's harbour master to give us a little push into the direction of the Harbour.
No problem its all arranged.
So we gets to the bar and no Harbour boat.
There's loads of folk calling him on the radio and telling him to go there but he's not the proper harbour master just the boat driver and he cant be bothered.
I'm now expecting some prat in a yacht demanding right of way to come flying round the corner. No such luck.
Harbour boats waiting off the town , Luckily gets rid of a few sailing dinghys with kids in, all going up the wall cos they cant have right of way across the river for once!
Harbour boat now takes a turn to port to our mooring buoy.
We carry staight on!!
At this point the guy finally gets to grips with the idea.
That we have'nt called him out just to be a nuisance.
Aha! But the fuel barge is broke down now so theres still no diesel. So wife tells me to play around with pipes and pumps
and things and get the diesel out of the other tank.
We managed to get plenty of diesel over the new carpet. Fitted last week oh and plenty of black marks on the newly washed setee. But only about two gallon in the tank.
Five oclock next day fuel barge is mended so we go over and
rammed it a couple of times just to see if it was as solid as it looked!! It was.
Then a leisurely trip back to plymouth.
Air Tours or Thompsons just dont get the same effect!!
