fed up

[saltyanchor]

Fed up

Sounding off. I’ve had it. After ten years of working in a job I hate (education) I can stand no more. I cannot get out – age 34, degree in physics, represented uk in the London International Youth Science Fortnight (very few get chosen) I am still told that I am too old etc etc to do anything else. To see a gp in this country you are better off paying. Even if you can get an NHS gp, they are so fed up aswell, that they are as grumpy as hell. ANYWAY, my philosophy is don’t moan, do something. I want to try to sail away. I have only been sailing for 6 or seven years. Just sold my monohull cruiser because I want to get into multihulls. My experience is limited – most I’ve done is deliver a 65 monohull (as crew) in a force 8, but it was a run all the way and a lot under motor, so easy going. Have a family, so feel I need a lot more experience and confidence before I can take them out safely. THE QUESTION: Where do I go to get it? Will obviously have to pay. I am looking at this long term. I need experience, time to buy a small cat (Heavenly twins maybe as first boat – to test the live aboard life first). I am well educated and can fix just about anything. Some money saved, plus the house of course. Probably too safety conscious in so far as I think everything through and worry about it all so much that I don’t get to enjoy the sailing (that’s something I just have to work out and moderate and learn to balance) With 70 % of the world as sea, there has to be a better life than putting up with the cr_p on land. It has to be tried anyway, I can’t just sit here and moan. I am losing my soul in this drudgery.
Please, any advice welcome, even the ones who will tell me I’ve got it all wrong – perhaps you can put me on a different path.
Thanks

 

[TrueBlue]

Salty,

You really make me weep with anguish, science teachers are short and the country desparately needs peeps with a good grounding in science (we can see the results of a lack of a science background in some of the questions posed here...)

I'm assumung you're working in the state sector or is it just as bad in the Private??

Surely somebody, somewhere can use your talents, and pay you reasonably to boot.

Perhaps you should emigrate - be appreciated elsewhere - and get better sailing conditions as well.

Sorry, not very helpful, I replied to register my dismay.

 

[kds]

Salty,

It is really sad to hear that you are not finding science teaching rewarding.
I had 35 great years teaching it - but I was in good schools. Maintained sector schools used to be fine - but you have to be very selective now - too many schools cater for parents who just want their kids babysat until they can leave home. Parents without high expectations = kids with low expectations = crap teaching experience.
Try the private sector - but they do demand their pound of flesh - 6 days a week plus evenings ?
As for the Sailing life ? I never had the courage to go for it - 4 kids didn't help but the real reason was that I couldn't see myself taking the risks of no income.
Good luck.

 

[simonfraser]

open decked cats are great in warmer climes, perhaps start with a smaller one, berthing is allways fun in the UK.

you can sail my 8m scamper in essex if you wish, let me know, totally unsuitable to live on though, too small.

 

[webcraft]

Don't moan, just do it. Work out a logical plan of action:

a) Find an affordable, safe mooring/berth (careful with marinas, they charge more for cats)

b) Start looking for a Heavenly Twins. I don't know much about cats, but if you are on a low budget and looking for a small cat with proven ocean crossing pedigree then this is about the only one (unless you go for a Wharram, and they are much more suited to warmer climes IMHO). You need to get in touch with Ship's Woofy, he's the only Twins owner I know of on this board, and is a very helpful sort of person.

c) Do a course or two . . . start with Day Skipper practical, do Yachtmaster Theory at evening classes. TOP CAT sailing school (Cornwall) do RYA practical courses on cats, and there are probably others.

d) Go out on your new boat with a mate who can sail and get thoroughly familiar with her to the point where you are comfortable single-handing most of the time.

e) Now take the family out on a nice day

You are on your way to warmer waters and a better life - one day at a time. Loads of work teaching in Trinidad a lady on a plane told me.

If you have a definite plan it may stop you being driven to the brink by teaching. The only reason I can still face going into a secondary school (albeit only part time on a supply basis) is because I have set a departure date and destination and am doing it as a means to a better end. (As opposed to a bitter end!)

Good luck,

Nick

 

[Spuddy]

Too Right.
I'm 59 and teaching technology (electronics) at a technology school - they won't fund it properly so I use bits of cardboard and desolder the components to reuse them 6 times.
It's not really possible to explain just how vile some of the pupils can be and how powerless we are. Some are terrific. Some are OK but bone idle. However the mentalists take up all our time so the rest don't get a look in.
I tried the private sector and they did want their pound of flesh but there wasn't amajor difference in behaviour; depends which countries they are recruiting from.
Stick out for agood one and you'll get a great and influential staffroom, subsidised housing and better pay, longer hols but full on terms plus better resourcing.
It might just be a passing mood at the beginning of term? Plus long nights and a lingering bit of flu - it is in my case.
I don't think the liveaboard life would be for me - especially with young kids but a few have made a success of it. For most it's "rusty bikes", an old boat with rusty bikes roped to the pushpit stuck in squalor without cash.
Miserable old so and so arn't I.
However you are 25 years younger than me with an enterprising attitude and a good set of marketable skills. Emigration could be a good option - maybe sail there. Even having a look at the options diminishes the gloom.
Sorry to everybody else for going on but you really struck a chord and I wish you well whatever you do.
regards...spuddy

 

[powerskipper]

Just an idea, but why don't you hire a cat down the med or somewhere for the 4-6 weeks of summer Hols and just take off with the family. see how it all goes, then have a family talk at the end,
This would give you something to look forwarders to and you will know a bit more what you are letting yourself in for.

Then you can plan what you want to do in the future.

 

[ShipsWoofy]

We are currently working out our plan to escape on our Heavenly Twins. She is plenty big enough if you can stop the need to hoard and own so many possessions. The way I see it, if you have a view of the world from your living room you don't need all the trinkets around the house. Here's hoping!

Just do it is my recommendation, if you are really so miserable, start your action plan, find the boat, learn her top to bottom, fit her out while you have your salary. With you holidays you can take extended cruises, find out your needs for living on board for long periods before you take the plunge.

I am biased, obviously. I think the Heavenly Twins is a good choice for live aboard cruising, as she is an excellent compromise. Space to live without being to big to park, narrow enough to go through French canals for instance and cheaper to park than the comparable sized monohull vessels. I from looking around think she is equivalent to say a 39-44ft mono with respect to size. She is easier to manage short handed with a small rig and is not so heavy when pulling alongside a wall or pontoon, grabbing the ladder at slow speeds approaching a wall you can stop her alone.

Have a look at my pages (addresses in sig) including owning a Heavenly Twins HERE.

I am free to answer any class specific questions.

You only live once!

 

[frilaens]

Hi,

As an "ex-pat" that has not lived in the UK for 15 years, I can say that there are always opportunities outside of the UK; you might have to get over the initial hurdles in a new country with language, work, culture differences, a different way of running things but usually there is a small community of foreigners to help out. If you want to stay in teaching try the British Council and good luck!

Andy

PS I took up sailing in mid-Norway; very down to earth boat culture and never needed to plan for tides and currents /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

[reginaldon]

Salty,
Apart from two enjoyable years in RN (National Service), spent 16 yrs in job, much of which I was not keen on - banking - I enjoyed running two sub branches, was certainly not going to get on any further - not prepared to join the band of brothers/. I did what I had regretted not doing years before - went to Coll of Ed and taught(state schools) First in a large but pleasant country comp. and then as Eng HOD in a tough town school - still enjoyed most of it, retired @ 59, pastored a church for 17 years - 5yrs concurrent, retired & now indulging my other passion - sailing, whatever you do, make the most of it

 

[boatmike]

Amongst all this sympathy I would like to tell you a few things I have learned in my 63 years of working and sailing. I do indeed sympathise but......

1. The person who has a job he dislikes joins the majority club. Most people hate their work. It's a crying shame.
2. If it IS broke DO MEND IT. There are other jobs out there, especially with a good education. You just need a little imagination and brass balls. Most people lack both.
3. It takes money to run a boat. Nothing comes free. Everyone wants their pound of flesh and you can't go for nowt. It ain't a solution to lifes problems but it sure can help for a while. Doing it on a low budget is not very fulfilling. You need to be able to afford to eat still, and the occasional bottle of vino is important too.
4. With a family you have to put them first. do THEY want to go to sea I wonder?

Sorry to be a wet blanket but the attitude of everyone these days is "I want it all and I want it now" Perhaps you need to work at something different for a while till you can afford to do it properly.....
When I was 35 my attitude was. "If I work my bollocks off now I can pay off the mortgage and buy a boat and retire early to enjoy life. That's what I have done eventually but I had to change directions, careers, countries, and attitudes in order to get there. It's bloody difficult! If you can afford to buy a boat and go sailing good on yer! I bought my first boat when I was 23 and I have had one ever since apart from one time when I had to sell up and use the money to put my kids through university...... They are now grown up and well educated and I have a boat again.....
I am dismayed by the way kids are now and would not teach again for all the money in the world. I started out with an engineering degree and worked in aerospace design. The project I worked on was cancelled so I went to the USA and got a job with BOING in Seattle. Hated it so left and ran a restaurant. Went broke and worked in a boatyard. Then taught for a while until I realised no bugger wanted to learn so I went back to boatbuilding in earnest and started my own marine engineering company. Great fun. Came back to England though to educate the kids and worked in boatbuilding, shipbuilding, defence, and some other less attractive things I would not like to mention. Then buggered off to Thailand to help build Mirabella I. When I returned worked as a project manager and sales executive for a shipbuilding company (I confess to being responsible for winning the Mirabella V contract for VT)
If I am honest I enjoyed most of it because when I didn't I changed it. Having sailed all my life however I like to keep it recreational and enjoy it. The people I have met who used it as an escape from reality learned the hard way that it ain't.
Take it easy. Perhaps have a couple of years teaching arithmetic to kids in Trinidad or something.... But don't run away to sea as a solution to your problem or Davey Jones will bite you in the arse and spit you out on the beach broke and busted. Do it as a sabbatical perhaps. Thinking time. Perhaps a 2 year trip. But remember there are only two things that are certainties in this life. One is death and the other I will keep secret cos I live with her!!
And for f***s sake cheer up! Think how well off you are compared to the poor buggers in Sri-Lanka who have lost everything! Get a plan. Be positive. but don't run away. Especially don't run away to sea. Only plan to be on a boat for long periods at a time when you have tried it and know you like it. Not because it's better than teaching.... It might not be!

 

[kandoma]

having done myself, what you are planning.... buy an airline ticket to Cristobal (Panama). Many people looking for crew across the pacific. A half a year of cruising will cost you in the range of $2000 per person. Then, when you like it and you have more experience, buy one of the boats off the people, who did not make it (see previous reply).... most people fail sooner or later. (try Tahiti or Samoa)

Peter

 

[Talbot]

sent you a PM - click on the flashing book on the left of the dark blue title bar.

 

[Birdseye]

I too am a Physics grad and spent a year teaching the unteachable fresh out of Uni. So I understand your frustration. But your solution isnt real life.

As someone has already said, you need money to run a boat if you want to enjoy even a bit of life rather than just exist. But you will also rapidly get frustrated doing nothing much at age 35. You will feel you are wasting your life. And you only get one.

Life needs to be a challenge, certainly when you are young. So try a career change. You might have to start a bit down the ladder in a non grad job, but so what. I had 30 years in manufacturing industry and whilst they wanted their pound of flesh (way more so than teaching even in private schools) I can honestly say I was never bored. And thats important in a long working life.

Or emigrate. You cant be sure that life is very different - we are not the only country with this sort of problem - but I suspect somewhere like NZ which is back in the 50's might be a good answer. And Physics teachers have to be in demand almost everywhere.

I too have had a cat. Ideal for liveaboard at anchor, but not for marina life. By the time you have paid the 1.5 times marina charge outside the UK, you might as well be in a mono.

Cheer up. But be realistic. Sailing off into the sunset isnt.

 

[tcm]

well scuse me but being a F8 whether on delivery or otherwise is not zero experience. Anyway, if you were just goofing around the world, you could plan it all to be on a run everywhere, and sit it out until you were, or turn round a bit?

google/Have a look at some of the weblogs of crusing families - one couple just bought a catamaran, has few lesson around the bay and set off. Seems fine. You can't ever guarantee that it'll be perfect and danger-free. Experience with rthe boiat you intend to use or a near-match is the most useful imho. I wd suggest getting the boat and getting confidence in that rathert than setting off the moment you have got the boat.

Oh, and my dad taught physics 40 years and he thought it was crap as well. Reads the poxy Which? magazine and the last 24 years he's bought a series of honda accords. Even tho like you he was quite bright, and also taught at a university. Good holidays tho - i never actually remeber him going to work and he even came home at lunchtimes.

So, stuff it, get the boat. Praps have a think about this in the moring....

 

[tsmyth]

I worked in accountancy for about 15 years, and grew more and more disilusioned and unhappy. At about your age, with two very young children, I threw in the job and company car and went to uni to study economics. After first year, I switched to psychology because I liked it - with no real thought of a future career. For years we lived on what most would regard as an unacceptable income, but we got by, and the kids did not go without. Eventually, after about 9 years of full-time and part-time study I had Honours and Masters degrees, and after one year full-time and 4 years part-time, I had a PhD. For the last 4 years I worked as an academnic, and I am still doing so.

Was it worth the effort? Financially no. From a personal satisfaction point of view, yes.

In my experience uni students have bcome progressively worse. Many would have been better advised to choose another path. A point to consider is that, by definition, 50% of people have an IQ of less than 100. Also, many do not know the meaning of the word "work".

The net result is that standards are falling. Moreover, if a student complains, by definition the academic involved is at fault - they are, after all, now "customers".

So, I understand your problems with teaching.

I find two saving factors. One is that there are some good students. The other is that I am approaching retiring age.

One option that you might wish to consider is moving to Australia. As I understand it, there is a shortge of scienec teachers here, and the weather is warmer for sailing - especially up north. Queensland is great for sailing, although it is rather humid at times.

However, I think you are likely to find the same problems with teaching in Australia. On the other hand, the benefits could well compensate.

I suspect that running away to sea will not work for you.

If you decide to continue with teaching, get your satisfaction from the few good students. You can achieve with them.

If you decide to change career, do not be put off by your age. I changed career at about your age, and I have not regretted it. My only sorrow is that my wife died of cancer about 2 years after I completed my PhD.

Perhaps you might like to consider Maslow's theory. You will find it discussed in most introductory psychology texts.

Best wishes,

Ray

 

[William_H]

Most teachers I know are unhappy. Many escape from the profession. However most people in any job are not really happy. It makes weekends and holidays something to look forward to. It takes a spercial kind of person to love wandering in a boat. I suggest do not commit unless you arer really sure. Suggestions of imigration to Oz are good. Boats are cheaper due to exchange rate. There are plenty of teaching jobs especially if you don't want the cities. But in the end it is still teaching. Good luck but don't count on sailing giving you your panacea. My son has just completed his first year teaching music in a country town West Oz 250 kids year 1 to 12 He has really enjoyed it with supportive community cheap housing. (sadly 100km from ocean) so just keep searching for a good school. regards will

 

[plk987]

I was in a similar position early last year, very good job, high salary and lots of travel, but I had come to hate it. So at 35 I took my wife & 3 kids on a life change. We have moved to Alderney in the channel islands where I am still self employed, but lots less pressure and the opportunity to experience other things....I'm buying my first boat.....

I haven't worn a suit in 6 months....

Only advice I would give, and I can only recommend going for it, is:

- treat the first year as a sabbatical, don't burn your bridges. We kept our house & rented it out, you may be able to trade down to a smaller house...it keeps you in the housing market and gives you and your family a safety net.
- don't worry about the kids...they really do adapt
- make the first step a sensible one, ie. don't cruise the african coast, try the med where facilities, language, flights home, etc are more familiar and close. My wife was all for it but she has needed to 'develop' her sense of adventure...so for us Alderney first, france next and then who knows.

Good luck and don't let the cynics put you off.

 

[Anonymous]

[ QUOTE ]
THE QUESTION: Where do I go to get it? Will obviously have to pay. I am looking at this long term. I need experience, time to buy a small cat (Heavenly twins maybe as first boat – to test the live aboard life first).

[/ QUOTE ]You mention that you have owned a cruiser for six years so you shouldn't have any problems with a small cat provided you don't do anything too ambitious to start with - maybe get someone to go out with you. You ask where to get "experience". You can only get that with sea-hours, preferably in command. Provided the finances stack up, why not get that Heavenly Twins and spend as much time as possible sailing her (with the family and without, as appropriate) while you are shaping-up your other life issues.

Finally, Good luck - I have been in a similar situation (different industry and circumstances) and feel for you. Life goes in cycles; this is one of your bad periods - it will come out just fine in the end even though it doesn't feel like it right now.

David

 

[ex-Gladys]

Just to encourage you, as a Phys grad also (but nearly 50) I am in my 3rd Career, that I didn't start until 7 years ago. You are not too old, you just don't want to work for anyone who thinks you are.....