ellen anecdote

[snowleopard]

recently had a tour of 'ocean planet' (u.s. around alone entrant). skipper proudly showed me his hand-built carbon fibre toilet then went on to say that when ellen had the tour her comment was 'you wuss, you've got a toilet, why don't you use a bucket like the rest of us'

 

[Twister_Ken]

Carbon fibre bucket, drilled for added lightness presumably?

 

[claymore]

Will she be used to toilets?

After all she is from Derbyshire.

regards
Claymore

 

[tcm]

Re: Will she be used to toilets?

yes that's right. I understand EM was actually looking around the guys house, not a boat at all.

 

[Guest]

Sheer bloody luxury!

If drilled for lightness - would the holes be sufficiently small to hold solids in?

Geoff

 

[jimi]

Re: Sheer bloody luxury!

Why would you want to keep 'em?

 

[claymore]

Re: Sheer bloody luxury!

Well. thats an interesting point there...why would you want to keep them in?
Hmm. OK - in our house we have a room upstairs where we could fit one of these devices. Dear Heart would need the solids on her compost so I suppose thats why we would need them to stay in- the stairs are not really where I would want them to be and as we have a kind of oatmeal/calf-muck coloured carpet - they solids would be kind of hard to spot at times sooooo.... having thought about it, I suppose - yes - we'd need the holes to be small enough to keep in the solids. Then again - holes could be really quite large, as long as they are drilled higher up the bucket - above the plimsoll line equivalent (perhaps a wellie line might be a safer option) - research would need to be carried out along the lines of what consituted an average bowelful then the line could be drawn to the topside of MHWS (mean high water solids) and then the drilling could begin. This would be really quite useful as it would give the carrier a better purchase on the container although on emptying, naturally there would be the recommendation that fingers are removed so that they don't get caught in the ebb.
Dear Heart read about some kind of naturally composting long drop device recently - does anyone else have to put up with the ravings of an eco-warrior?

regards
Claymore

 

[jimi]

Re: Sheer bloody luxury!

Weel Laddie, ye've gang a' saft wi' a' this siller ye're bankin' awa'. Whit ye really need tae dae is hing the bucket oot the windae an' ye'll no mess up yer hoose. In fact we recycle them as windae baskits. And ah'd rather dae ma business o'er the rail (tae leeward of coorse) than spill it a' o'er the boacht!

 

[claymore]

Re: Sheer bloody luxury!

Jamesie
A widdle wi ma willie is a daily occurance oer ra rail - are ye tellin me that ye point the cheeks o yer bare airse an' let fly wi the jobbies?
jings mon - an youse amang they southern jessies - whit dae they mak o tha'?

regards
Claymore

 

[davidhand]

You know Some time ago I was going down to my boat and Ocean Planet was tied nearby with about half dozen guys standing around, one of them said to me "give us a hand with the main". I thought they were joking but it took seven or eight of us to carry the sail from the boat up to the sail loft. How does one person handle one of those things out on the water?

 

[jimi]

Re: Sheer bloody luxury!

Claysie babe,
Och mon ah wis jist fashin' that ye were peeing on the carpets. Whit is really needed is a Jobbie wheecha . remember yon that the Big Yin wis oan aboot afore he got a' big heided. Ah mind weel that when ma wife tae be speired whit a' did when a wis in the hills an a telt hur ah wiped ma arse wi' heather she thocht ah wis awfie macho!

 

[claymore]

Re: Sheer bloody luxury!

Wee Jamesie
Which end o' ra heather wis ye usin' ? Ah hope it wasnae the one wi they leaves an bells on - on account o' ra fact that that widnae be sae macho - sae reassure me wee mannie that ye wis using the stick end.
The jobbie wheecher - that wis the line aboot rowatie boatety, catchety fishetie, munchety crunchety was it no?
Briwyant!
Ma favourite wis ra last supper! " Yin O' youse bastards is goin tae shop me!"

regards
Claymore

 

[sailbadthesinner]

Re: Sheer bloody luxury!

No the jagged bunnet?


Wedding can be an anagram of 'JUST HANDOVER THE MONEY' if you can't spell.

 

[jimi]

Re: Sheer bloody luxury!

Claysie,
Dae ye think ah'm saft? When there's bells on the heather its tae hot for a' that climbing lark, forbye the hills are fu' o' midges then. When ah went climbin' the heather wiz frozen sae solid that wipin' yer arse wi' a grater wiz mair luxurious.

"Hey Peter, Ah can see yer hoose fae here!"

 

[Twister_Ken]

You swine

So it was you who dumped that lump on the shoulder of Ben Afflick, was it?

Never mind the heather, it's worming tablets you need.

 

[jimi]

Sow\'s here!

Ken, that was'nt me, it was the wife! Had to go all the way back to Carlisle for some soft tissue!