david_steward
New member
It was all planned so well. We were going to take 'Odyssea' from Ramsgate down to the Solent for a week on the 27th.
Arrangements were made to have a glass or two of shandy with Pauline and all in Brighton on the way. BarryD was going to come down and Colin was dropping in for New Years Eve.
The weather put the kibosh on Thurs/Fri but it all looked set fair for Saturday. Everything was packed and we set off for the boat Friday in good spirits. Being Mr Conscientious boatowner I checked the oil Friday pm. One of our trusty Volvos (Bjorn and Benny) was low on oil. So topped it up and then my darling wife Sarah, lying on the couch casually pointed out the oil running down one of the filters. Bugger.
So its down in the engine room to tighten it up. Trouble is, it wasn't leaking from the filter at all. A short rubber hose with a crimped on banjo fitting each end was leaking from one of the crimps. This hose runs from the block to the oil cooler and is only 8" long. I had to remove one of the oil filters to get it off with the predictable results. I exited the engine room looking like I had been swimming under the Torrey Canyon and there was a major environmental disaster in the making in the bilge. Blacker than a gorilla's goolies it was. Why oh why did we get a cream carpet?
It is now 6pm on Friday where was I going to get a new hose?
I rang the local hydraulic people and got through to their emergency on call chap. So we drove 40 miles to meet the chap at the depot. Great I thought. How wrong I was.
Got up at 6 am Saturday to fit the new hose. Trouble was, it was 3/4" too bloody long. Coz the rubber hose was only a short run there was no chance of losing this extra hence no way of getting this new hose on. AaaaaaRRRRRGGGGHHH!
Had to leave by 9am if we were going and Sunday looked iffy so had to cancel our trip. But fate hadn't finished with me yet.
We drove home via the depot and got the chap to make us another hose. Had a lovely lunch in a pub Sunday complete with armchairs, live jazz and a roaring log fire. Then back to the boat. Got up early New Years Eve to fit hose no 2. Only 1/2" too long this time but still zero chance of getting it on.
So we went to different hose place 45 miles away and they had a go. When they presented it to me I measured it carefully and pronounced it to long by 3/8". What is it with these people I wondered?
So they also gave me some spare banjo fittings, some hose, and four stainless jubilee type clips. As predicted, hose no 3 wouldn't fit either, finally got the spare hose and jubilee clips fitted on there at 6 pm. Two clips each end should stand at least 100 psi they said. Oil pressure only 45 psi so should be ok I thought.
And it is. But why oh why did Volvo think that this was the best solution to the problem? Surely some sort of rigid pipe would be far simpler and more durable? The original pipe was distorted into an S shape due to it being so short . This is probably why it failed in the first place.
Volvo sell a replacement, £120 plus vat. I had four made and it only cost £35 in total.
So we went to the Royal Temple Yacht Club New Year do and got totally bladdered. No loud shirts coz it was posh frocks and black ties. Well mine had some black on it, round the back, just by the purple.
So apologies to all those I was planning to meet up with. See some of you on the 11th perhaps.
And to whatever Volvo designer came up with that pipe, I would like to personally cut your knackers off with a pair of blunt pinking shears. And then make you lick my carpet clean.
Well now thats off my chest. Pass the Temazepam.
And if any of you have some nice stories to tell of Xmas cruising, you can all just sod off.
Dave S
Arrangements were made to have a glass or two of shandy with Pauline and all in Brighton on the way. BarryD was going to come down and Colin was dropping in for New Years Eve.
The weather put the kibosh on Thurs/Fri but it all looked set fair for Saturday. Everything was packed and we set off for the boat Friday in good spirits. Being Mr Conscientious boatowner I checked the oil Friday pm. One of our trusty Volvos (Bjorn and Benny) was low on oil. So topped it up and then my darling wife Sarah, lying on the couch casually pointed out the oil running down one of the filters. Bugger.
So its down in the engine room to tighten it up. Trouble is, it wasn't leaking from the filter at all. A short rubber hose with a crimped on banjo fitting each end was leaking from one of the crimps. This hose runs from the block to the oil cooler and is only 8" long. I had to remove one of the oil filters to get it off with the predictable results. I exited the engine room looking like I had been swimming under the Torrey Canyon and there was a major environmental disaster in the making in the bilge. Blacker than a gorilla's goolies it was. Why oh why did we get a cream carpet?
It is now 6pm on Friday where was I going to get a new hose?
I rang the local hydraulic people and got through to their emergency on call chap. So we drove 40 miles to meet the chap at the depot. Great I thought. How wrong I was.
Got up at 6 am Saturday to fit the new hose. Trouble was, it was 3/4" too bloody long. Coz the rubber hose was only a short run there was no chance of losing this extra hence no way of getting this new hose on. AaaaaaRRRRRGGGGHHH!
Had to leave by 9am if we were going and Sunday looked iffy so had to cancel our trip. But fate hadn't finished with me yet.
We drove home via the depot and got the chap to make us another hose. Had a lovely lunch in a pub Sunday complete with armchairs, live jazz and a roaring log fire. Then back to the boat. Got up early New Years Eve to fit hose no 2. Only 1/2" too long this time but still zero chance of getting it on.
So we went to different hose place 45 miles away and they had a go. When they presented it to me I measured it carefully and pronounced it to long by 3/8". What is it with these people I wondered?
So they also gave me some spare banjo fittings, some hose, and four stainless jubilee type clips. As predicted, hose no 3 wouldn't fit either, finally got the spare hose and jubilee clips fitted on there at 6 pm. Two clips each end should stand at least 100 psi they said. Oil pressure only 45 psi so should be ok I thought.
And it is. But why oh why did Volvo think that this was the best solution to the problem? Surely some sort of rigid pipe would be far simpler and more durable? The original pipe was distorted into an S shape due to it being so short . This is probably why it failed in the first place.
Volvo sell a replacement, £120 plus vat. I had four made and it only cost £35 in total.
So we went to the Royal Temple Yacht Club New Year do and got totally bladdered. No loud shirts coz it was posh frocks and black ties. Well mine had some black on it, round the back, just by the purple.
So apologies to all those I was planning to meet up with. See some of you on the 11th perhaps.
And to whatever Volvo designer came up with that pipe, I would like to personally cut your knackers off with a pair of blunt pinking shears. And then make you lick my carpet clean.
Well now thats off my chest. Pass the Temazepam.
And if any of you have some nice stories to tell of Xmas cruising, you can all just sod off.
Dave S
