Alternative (to Boatin') sports for the Irish (NB)

Beagle

New member
Joined
20 Apr 2004
Messages
461
Location
Holland
Visit site
Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish (NB)

Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop. Right away they go to the bird section and Mick says to Paddy; "Dat's Dem." The shopkeeper comes over and asks if he can help. "Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere budgies in dat cage op dere," says Mick. "Put dem in a pepper bag." The shopkeeper does as asked and the two pay for the birds and leave.

They get into Mick's van and drive until they reach a cliff with a 500ft drop.
"Dis looks like a grand place," says Mick. He then takes the two birds out of the bag, places them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff. Paddy watches as his mate drops off the edge and goes straight down for a few seconds followed by "Splat".
As Paddy looks over the edge of the cliff he shakes his head and says, "Fock Dat, dis budgie jumpin" is too fockin dangerous for me..."
A few minutes later, Seamus approaches. He too has been to the pet shop and is carrying the familiar "pepper bag". He then pulls a parrot out of
the bag and Paddy notices that in the other hand Seamus is carrying a gun. Watch this Paddy" he says, as he launches himself over the edge of the cliff. Paddy watches as half way down Seamus takes the gun and blows the parrot's head off.
Seamus continues to plummet until there is another 'Splat' and he joins Mick at the bottom of the cliff.
Paddy shakes his head and says, "An' oim never troyin' that parrotshooting noider..."
After a few minutes, Sean strolls up. He too has been to the pet shop and walks up with his 'pepper bag.'
Instead of a parrot he pulls a chicken out of the bag
and launches himself off the cliff with the usual result. Once more Paddy shakes his head- "Fock me Sean, first der was Mick wit his budgie jumpin, den Seamus parrotshooting - and now you fockin'hengliding......!!"

<hr width=100% size=1>I came, I saw, she conquered (the original Latin seems to have been garbled).
 

jimi

Well-known member
Joined
19 Dec 2001
Messages
28,660
Location
St Neots
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish (NB)

Just then Shaun turns up dressed in a Spacesuit with a basket of Eruca vesicaria sativa

<hr width=100% size=1>
 

orion21

New member
Joined
22 Jan 2004
Messages
165
Location
Orkney (scotland)
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish (NB)

HOW BECKY GOT HER MONEY BACK
>
>She goes into Wal-Mart and tells the clerk she wants a refund for the
>toaster she bought because it doesn't work. The clerk tells her that he
>can't give her a refund because she bought it on special.
>All of a sudden,the woman throws her arms up in the air and starts
>screaming!
>
>"GRAB MY BREASTS! GRAB MY BREASTS!"
>
>The clerk, not knowing what to do, runs to get the store manager. The
>manager comes up to the Woman and asks, "What's wrong?" She explains the
>
>situation with the toaster. He tells her that he can't give her a refund
>
>because she bought it on special. Once again, the woman throws her arms
>up in the air and starts screaming,
>
>"GRAB MY BREASTS! GRAB MY BREASTS!"
>
>In shock, the store manager pleads, "Ma'am, why are you saying that?"
>In a huff, the woman says, "BECAUSE, I LIKE TO HAVE MY BREASTS GRABBED
>WHEN I'M GETTING SCREWED!"
>---Her money was refunded


<hr width=100% size=1>
 

Cutter

Active member
Joined
11 Jul 2002
Messages
1,594
Location
Southampton
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish (NB)

Rocket salad for the non salad eaters!
Good one Jimi

<hr width=100% size=1>
 

Goodge

Member
Joined
13 Jun 2003
Messages
702
Location
Solent
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish (NB)

I preferred it when his humour was a bit more obvious !

<hr width=100% size=1>
 

Evadne

Active member
Joined
27 Feb 2003
Messages
5,752
Location
Hampshire, UK
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish

He seems to have taken criticism for speaking Jockanese to heart, and has resorted to Latin!

<hr width=100% size=1>
 

BobE

Member
Joined
15 Jan 2002
Messages
599
Location
Hampshire (West)
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish

Fer Rice Cakes no more dead languages I'm lost !!
Thanks for the translation tho'..
Cheers Bob E...

<hr width=100% size=1>
 

jimi

Well-known member
Joined
19 Dec 2001
Messages
28,660
Location
St Neots
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish

Don't be daft, the Romans did'nt have velcro or they'd have worn something a bit more fashionable than a toga!

<hr width=100% size=1>
 

Evadne

Active member
Joined
27 Feb 2003
Messages
5,752
Location
Hampshire, UK
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish

Search me Guv. I only learned one furrin language at school, and this wasn't in the Dick and Harry.

<hr width=100% size=1>
 

longjohnsadler

New member
Joined
14 Nov 2002
Messages
2,080
Location
NW Ireland
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish (NB)

Best Irish joke of the last 20 years:
Whilst England has been getting progressively over-crowded, over-priced and generally rather jaded, large parts of Ireland are on the Up.

<hr width=100% size=1>
 

Samphire

New member
Joined
23 Oct 2001
Messages
108
Location
SW Ireland.
Visit site
Re: Alternative (to Boatin\') sports for the Irish (NB)

Oh Dear you seem to have used the English spelling ,its correctly spelt Sean.Never mind.

<hr width=100% size=1>
 
Top