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TWERP !

normskib

Member
Joined
27 Sep 2010
Messages
129
On. My way down from Sunbury Lock to Molesey this week I noticed in the distance a boat coming toward me full steam on his port side going up and my starboard going down ! as he was some distance away I felt sure he would notice the error of his ways and crossover to the opposite side of the river but no he just kept coming ! When it got a bit to close to comfort and to avoid a head on collision I was the one that moved over to the Center of the river ! and when we finally passed each other the guy at the helm yelled out at the top of his voice your on the wrong side of the F#####g River !!! I was absolutely Flabbergasted . Now I could understand the situation a little more if the boat in question was maybe a hired boat just out for the day or someone playing blind man’s bluff but this vessel looked to me like a well used 20 ft boat ! So now I’m just wounded if anyone out there in Forum Land can Top that experience .
 

Old Crusty

Active member
Joined
28 Aug 2017
Messages
681
Can't top it but can remember being on patrol for Dorney Olympics, heading upstream by Oakley Court Hotel early one morning and well over to my starboard side of the wide reach.

Coming downstream at full steam was a narrowboat, on a reciprocal, collision course. I waited for it to move to the centre of the fairway but it just kept on directly at me. When it was about 50m away, I stopped, put on the blue light and gave one long blast on the horn.

The narrowboat changed course and passed down my port side with a 5m gap. As it went by, the skipper, male, mid 60s, Breton cap, barked, 'Downstream traffic has right of way!'

So I spun the patrol boat round, came up alongside the dangerous fool and presented him with a guide to boating on the Thames, that he threw in the river.

Later, we had a stand up chat without coffee at Boveney Lock about the rule of the road, right of way and avoiding collision rules. Strangely, the power was off so afterwards, he had to wind through while being watched by three smiling patrol boat crews.

'Welcome to the Thames, where's your visitor licence?' said a colleague, having crawled all over the narrowboat.

His day just went from bad to worse.
 

plumbob

Active member
Joined
18 Oct 2009
Messages
302
Location
Bucks
3 weeks ago coming downstream from Marlow lock we were being followed by 3 guys in a cruiser and 1 NB. Its fair to say the cruiser was too close . As we took the left hand bend by Longridge a Shetland 4 plus 2 was there right on the bow coming upstream. No room to alter course so I slammed into neutral. Blue smoke everywhere and how the boat behind missed us I have no idea. The lady in the Shetland just managed to swerve and its probably a good job it was an outboard motor. A very sheepish sorry didn't really cut it, but we survived. No gin was spilt during the telling of this incident.
 

Chris_d

Well-known member
Joined
15 Jun 2001
Messages
4,352
Location
Oxfordshire
That corner by Longridge always seems to produce some close encounters, I always go really wide going downstream and very tight in coming up, but there is always one that appears suddenly with brain disengaged:)

Narrowboats sometimes still seem to be in narrow canal mode, they are used to passing each other with inches to spare so seem to find it odd that cruisers need so much room. Having been on parts of the Oxford canal where its very shallow you go straight down the middle and only move over at the last second to pass an oncoming boat very closely, this usually involves stirring up a lot of mud and one or both of the boats running aground!
 

Outinthedinghy

Active member
Joined
18 May 2008
Messages
907
Location
Limehouse hole
I had an older gentleman in a very expensive looking beaver stern gentleman's launch the other day on the wrong side.

I was coming up river past the Hellfire club / Medmenham abbey on the starboard side of the River. He was giving it some oil and took the bend much too wide. Like he hadn't seen my vessel.
I decided against using my 16 tonnes of 1980s steel with its axe bow shape in anger so I moved over and let him go because I think he had messed it up somewhat and I'd hate to scratch my paintwork and have to collect him from the water had his boat rolled over.
 

Portland Billy

Active member
Joined
31 Aug 2009
Messages
424
I also wish rowing clubs would instil some 'rules of the road ' knowledge into their members.
Especially in overtaking mode. Shouting and wild gesticulating for the 'stand on' vessel to get out of the way is not very polite!
 

AuntyRinum

Well-known member
Joined
30 Jul 2003
Messages
10,859
Location
Travelling
A few years ago I was going up river and turning slowly in to Thames and Kennet Marina at Caversham. The entrance channel is very narrow and, as I entered it, I was confronted with a small cruiser coming straight at me on my side. He panicked and put his helm over to port which ran him aground and I reversed out giving three blasts on the horn to let him know that I was going astern. He got himself off the mud and I waited for him to come out. As he came past me he shouted abuse at me for "hooting" at him.
 

rotrax

Well-known member
Joined
17 Dec 2010
Messages
12,293
Location
South Oxon, Littlehampton and Wellington, NZ.
The South Stratford canal has many narrow and tight bridgeholes, some entered or exited on a bend.

When navigating this interesting canal I would often give one long blast on the vessels horn - usually a full size narrowboat - to let unsighted approacing boats know something was coming.

It often had motorists passing over or approaching the bridge we were about to pass under clapping on their anchors with a howl of rubber!

Some of these South Stratford Bridgeholes were REALLY narrow - just a couple of inches each side, as tight as entering a lock, but on the skew.

By comparison the dear old Thames is as wide as a six lane California Freeway.........................................
 

Outinthedinghy

Active member
Joined
18 May 2008
Messages
907
Location
Limehouse hole
The road bridge just before Grove bridge near Watford on the GU is good for that. Vehicle drivers often blast the horn and because it is just before a sharp bend on the cut you also sound your boat horn.

Quite funny in a way.

I was moored up near the entrance to the channel which goes down to the Windsor racecourse marina one day in the summer.

Quite a few reasonably large sealines in and out of there and it's a fairly narrow channel with limited visibility specially at the top end..

Anyway this 40ft sealines comes down and as he enters the channel he gives TWO blasts on the horn..

So if anyone is coming the other way they will assume there is someone indicating a green to green situation (two blasts is I am going to my port and would like to pass on your starboard side ie green to green).

I don't understand why he did two when one long blast would have been correct and perfectly audible. He was just indicating his presence and not crossing to the other side of the channel.

Better to make no noise at all then to simply confuse the situation!!
 

Old Crusty

Active member
Joined
28 Aug 2017
Messages
681
The road bridge just before Grove bridge near Watford on the GU is good for that. Vehicle drivers often blast the horn and because it is just before a sharp bend on the cut you also sound your boat horn.

Quite funny in a way.

I was moored up near the entrance to the channel which goes down to the Windsor racecourse marina one day in the summer.

Quite a few reasonably large sealines in and out of there and it's a fairly narrow channel with limited visibility specially at the top end..

Anyway this 40ft sealines comes down and as he enters the channel he gives TWO blasts on the horn..

So if anyone is coming the other way they will assume there is someone indicating a green to green situation (two blasts is I am going to my port and would like to pass on your starboard side ie green to green).

I don't understand why he did two when one long blast would have been correct and perfectly audible. He was just indicating his presence and not crossing to the other side of the channel.

Better to make no noise at all then to simply confuse the situation!!
That must have been Toad, TOOT TOOT!
 

nicho

Well-known member
Joined
19 Feb 2002
Messages
8,169
Location
Home - Midlands, Boat - South Coast
Many years ago when we were on the Thames in our F33, somewhere near Bray Marina, a single rower came towards us heading straight for our boat. I pulled right into the side and stopped, but he kept coming straight for us. To warn him I gave a short toot on the horn which startled him. He launched into a foul mouthed rant about our wash (we were stopped). I was livid and
shouted “you want f***ing wash, you can f***ing have some”, spun the wheel over and gunned 500 horsepower into action. The
guy took off, arms a blur. SWMBO went ballistic with me, and being more scared of her than the Courts I stopped. Hate the bas*ards more than the dinghy sailors in Chichester Harbour.
 

oldgit

Well-known member
Joined
6 Nov 2001
Messages
23,094
Location
Medway
The joys of boating on Gods Own ( financially challenged) river.




Visit the Medway. Peace, Love, Courtesy and loads of cash being spent on infra structure . :)
 

rotrax

Well-known member
Joined
17 Dec 2010
Messages
12,293
Location
South Oxon, Littlehampton and Wellington, NZ.
After experiencing abd boating on the Thames from the 60's into the early 80's and living for the last 50 years within a mile or two of the Upper Reaches I honestly believe I would struggle to cope with it now.

This thread reinforces that view.

Since taking to the ocean and having a boat that can spend up to a fortnight on the hook without needing to re-water or re-provision I would be frustrated in what appears to be the norm on this wonderful river.

The canal system seems to be too busy for me too these days!
 

pavlosimou

Member
Joined
12 Sep 2006
Messages
208
Location
Mudway
The joys of boating on Gods Own ( financially challenged) river.




Visit the Medway. Peace, Love, Courtesy and loads of cash being spent on infra structure . :)
Pahahahahaha, sorry I think I have just wet myself a little.

Visit the Medway , where Jetskis roam freely at 50 knots, Asshats pass moored boats just off the plane with a 3 foot wake, nobody has invested a penny in a hundred years and nobody polices the waterway. and the port authority couldn't give a toss. there is nowhere to go between Queenborough and Allington except sun pier (and you don't want to go there)....Other than that its lovely and i wouldn't be anywhere else ;);):cool:
 
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